


Trials of Love

by Rose_lily_sunflowers



Series: Hanahaki stories [2]
Category: DCU, DCU (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Young Justice (Cartoon), Young Justice (Comics), Young Justice - All Media Types
Genre: Aromantic, Bad Parents Jack and Janet Drake, Bisexual Tim Drake, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt Tim Drake, Illnesses, M/M, Original Character(s), Terminal Illnesses, Tim Drake Has a Bad Time, Tim Drake Needs a Hug, Tim Drake is Not Okay, Tim Drake-centric, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 43,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27251770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rose_lily_sunflowers/pseuds/Rose_lily_sunflowers
Summary: Tims first mistake was falling in love, his second mistake was not confessing at the right time.Becouse now, his loved one is no longer available and he has to deal with the consequences.
Relationships: Batfamily Members & Tim Drake, Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake/Kon-El | Conner Kent
Series: Hanahaki stories [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1982083
Comments: 30
Kudos: 187





	1. What they were

Tim was ten years old when he first heard about love.

He heard it at school, when other students were gossiping about the older students who were holding hands and going out together. They called them a couple and said those people were in love. Some of them even went as far as saying they have a crush in someone.

It was a strange concept for Tim, his role models in this area were his parents who never seemed to get along or show any affection for each other--

\--Or him.

Their lack of presence in the house was something he never fully digested and finally decided their absence meant they had something more important to do on the other side of the world. Their feelings for eachother weren't evident at all. They were great colleagues and worked together perfectly, but other than that they lived their lives as if it was a job and a task.

Tims ten year-old mind couldn't come up with a solution on its own. As much as he hated it, he asked his parents about "love" at dinner one saturday night. His mother had made roast chicken that night and his parents had poured some wine for themselves, not caring if there was a child present in the room.

When they heard his question, Both of his parents froze. They looked at each other for a minute and Tim regretted ever asking it at the same moment. Tim looked down and toyed with his vegetables and hoped from the depth of his heart that his parents would forget about it.

They didn't.

His mother took a large sip of her drink before carelessly saying: "it's nothing but a splash of hormones and dangerous feelings."

Tim raised an eyebrow. The kids in his school seemed to be having so much fun talking about love stories and the older high school students seemed happy, what was so dangerous about it?

His mother looked at his eyes for the first time that day. "Some fall too deep." his mother explained emotionlessly. "When someone loves another who doesn't love them back, they get hanahaki. A very painful illness." Tim saw a flash of memories in his mother's blue eyes but decided not to comment on it, but his curiosity got the better of him.

"Mom, have you ever got it?" he asked, his eyes shone with curiosity and innocence. His mother spared a glance at him for one moment before looking back at the salads.

"Yes, and I got the flowers removed." His mother said emotionlessly. "I do not remember any of it."

Tim's eyes widened the childhood innocence plain between the blue eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked.

His father put the conversation up to a stop. "That's enough Timothy." he said calmly. "Hanahaki isn't something to take lightly."

Tim nodded obediently and didn't push the subject any further. He finished his dish and politely excused himself to bed.

His parents informed him that they are leaving tomorrow for an emergency in Egypt. Tim didn't give it much thought, it wasn't their first time and he could manage.

That night, he tried to sleep. He was close to falling into the merciful hands of unconsciousness when he caught his mother opening the door and coming inside. He pretended to be sleeping because whatever had dragged his mother here couldn't have been good.

She watched him sleep for several moments before she leaned down and gently pushed his black hair out of his face. It took everything in Tim not to flinch away from her rare touch.

She leaned down, her face inches away from his. "Never fall in love, Timothy." His mother said and gently stroked the rebellious hair. "Or someday you'll see yourself unable to even like the child you created."

Something in Tim was broken a little by those words. Those simple words were proof of something he knew for most of his life.

His mother left without saying any other words and closed the door behind her.

Tims eyes widened and he sat up. His eyes could barely see anything in the darkness of his room. Tim stared at the closed door while an empty feeling clutched his heart and made it hard to breath.

It took a while for Tim to realise the fact that parents were absent so much in his life was because they both had undergone the flower removal surgeries too late and had both lost the ability to ever love again.

They couldn't love anyone, Not their partner and definitely not their son.

It took some time for Tim to realise the reason they were so cold was because, one way or another, they didn't love him. They couldn't love him.

Tim was fine with it.

He understood them.

Or so he told himself as he watched the darkness when his parents left for Egypt and left him alone in the huge house. The silence settled in his soul. his eyes burned but he couldn't bring himself to cry. He held his batman blankets closer to himself and put his head back on the pillows.

=======

The White family were Tim's neighbors, A loving family who celebrated too loudly. Sometimes, Tim watched them from his window. Their daughter was Tims classmate and They never failed to show up for the most irrelevant things. Unlike Tim who was always alone The girl always had her parents around her.

Her name was Mary. She had long curly blonde hair and sharp hazel eyes. She was the first and last civilian to ever realise Tim's parents neglectful behavior. 

The Whites could have called the police, for reasons that are still a mystery for Tim, they didn't. Instead they found ridiculous reasons to invite him for dinner every night. They always made sure he had some home cooked food for Dinner even if Tim declined their invitation.

"My mom made some amazing cake/garlic bread do you wanna have some?" was Mary's favorite line.

Mr and Mrs white worked at STAR labs. Most of their work was done here in gotham in collaboration with Wayne labs. However, they somehow still found time to make a strong family, something very rare in gotham. The more surprising thing was that they managed to open a space for Tim. Too much exposure to their house made Tim feel more at home when he was with the whites than when he was at Drake manor.

However, Mary was a little bit bad with personal boundaries. She came and went in Drake manor without prior warning. Whatever she wanted, she just opened the door with her spare key and stepped inside.

That day was one of those days when Mary brought a bunch of junk food and came to their house for their games.

Nonchalantly, Mary opened the door of Drake's house and found her way to Tims room. She knocked once. "Tim! I hope you didn't forget your promise about the play station game." she shouted.

"Mary! You're here already??" Tim shouted from the other side.

"Yeah, You said I should be here at five! And now it's five." she said loudly. "Can I come in?"

"Yes!" Tim shouted. "I mean-- No!!"

But he was too late. Mary had already opened the door and had seen Tims room.

She almost dropped the bag of chips she was holding and her mouth dropped. 

The untidy room was normal. What surprised her was the wall in front of her. Tims entire wall was covered in pictures of Batman and Robin. He had also glued notes to the walls and connected the pictures with red strings just like in the movies.

Mary had just cought Tim in the middle of Tims plan for finding out Batman and Robin's secret ID.

Mary stared at Tim and pointed at the wall. "What the H." Mary said loudly. "I've never seen so many pictures of batman! Where did you get them??"

Tim nervously touched the back of his neck and shrugged. "I uh... I got them myself!!?" he murmured. 

Mary buried her face in her hands. "Unbelievable." she murmured but her voice was muffled.

Tim stood up but didn't try to cover his investigations. "Batman's is slipping. Or else I would have never been able to get all these photos." Tim said. "He's been like that since Robin died."

Mary's eyes widened. "Robin is dead?? When?? How??" she asked loudly.

"No no no listen." Tim tried to explain. He pointed to two photos taken from robin from different angles. "These are two different people! The first robin is now the ghost of bludhaven!! The vigilante known as nightwing!! The other one is dead. Obviously. There were leaked photos from Bosnia which Showed Batman carrying Robins... Corpse."

Then Tim turned back to the wall and pointed at many other photos of the thugs that had confronted Batman lately. "And since then! Batman has gone violent. Which is why Batman needs a robin." Tim concluded.

Mary hit her forehead. "My best friend has gone insane." she murmured.

"My BeSt FrIENd hAs GOnE iNsANe." Tim mocked. "Don't you get it? Batman needs this... Gotham needs this."

Tim turned back to see Mary eye to eye again. "I want to get in their lives as much as I can to fix this problem." Tim murmured. "If only I can get the first Robin to be Robin again."

Mary bit her lip. "Their lives are dangerous." she murmured. "And no one has managed to get Batman's ID for years... What makes you think you can?"

Tim narrowed his eyes and looked back at the wall and the scraps of his investigations. "I know I can." he said stubbornly.

"Well it's still dangerous."

"I know." Tim murmured and stuck the latest Robin picture to his wall. His eyes didn't leave the photos. "But I want to be one of them. Batman is going down a dark path, Mary. I know what it's like to be alone and... I know how sad it'll make one feel."

=======

He was twelve years old when he confronted Batman and demanded to be the third robin.

Bruce always kept him at an arm's length. Tim knew he was afraid of losing him just like he lost Jason, But somehow he saw Bruce Wayne's face more than he saw his own parents. Bruce came to every single one of his school plays, fair and festivals. The strange feeling of being supported was new and extremely welcome. Tim never wanted it to end.

True, He was devastated when his parents were killed but he traded one dysfunctional family for another when he signed the papers and Bruce was made his adoptive father.

The reason for being dysfunctional was very different, though.

Bruce was cold but he showed his love in different ways. The fact that suddenly there were no bullies in his school or that they left everything and went to a circus for Tim's birthday (which he had forgotten himself) made Tim realise Bruce really cared.

Dick was different, he fit in the older brother role perfectly. His warmth and his smile and his presence was one of the most reassuring things Tim had ever seen. Tim felt at peace for a long time and found his own place within the family.

He never met Jason, Jason was the second robin who died on duty. Somehow his ghost was always present in everything bruce did. Gotham was filled with charity works done in Jason Todd-Wayne's name. Tim was ok with that. It showed Bruce was capable of caring for his son, he was capable of loving his son, unlike certain people.

Of all of them, Cassandra was his favorite. She couldn't talk but that didn't matter because Tim wasn't good with words either. They understood each other in a way he understood no one else. Robin and Blackbat were the best team ever. Also the best siblings ever.

His relationship with Damian started off rocky, which was mostly Damians fault. He tried to kill Tim a few times and they had one of the worst fights within the bat family ever recorded.

And Stephanie... He was too afraid to fall in love with her that he ruined everything. Well, Fun while it lasted.

=======

Mary slid out of his life as soundlessly as she came. In his first few years as Robin Mary's parents started off a risky project and painted themselves as a target of the Falcone. There was a prize for Mr and Mrs Whites head so the left Gotham without ever looking back.

Mary promised they'd keep in touch but the nature of them going under the radar meant Mary couldn't text anyone and Tim couldn't skip patrol and go all the way to Central City for a quick game of minecraft.

It pained Tim a little but he wasn't alone anymore, he had his family on his side. Although one of the strangest families in the world, the Wayne's supported themselves like no other.

Tim didn't need or want any friends or to interact with anyone outside of the circle of the batclan.

However, It all changed when Tim met the new superman clone and his friends. The fragile sense of peace he had with this family was shattered when he saw the clone and his new "friends"

That day, Bruce angrily put his cowl back on and murmured: "great there are two of them now."

Tim just shrugged it off and followed Batman to the hall of justice to meet the new meta humans they have found: Superboy, Wondergirl and impulse.

They became instant friends. Somehow they completed each other like a four piece puzzle. The moment the league left them alone, Tim hacked the Justice league servers and gave the four of them access to the watchtower.

The feeling of teleporting via a zeta tube was a strange feeling and Tim realised he loved it, especially if it meant he was around friends.

They went over there and Tim wanted to give them a complete tour. Impulse ran around and circled it three times. Superboy and Cassie hovered above the ground, their eyes glued to the magnificent view of the earth.

"Woooow." Cassie murmured and Tim watched both of them with awe.

Suddenly there was a flow of wind and Impulse appeared and pulled Cassie down from her foot. "Cassie! Cassie! Cassie!" Impulse said and circled her on the ground. "They have Amazonian food!" he said happily and threw her a catalogue.

Cassie's eyes widened and she opened it and stared at the pictures of food on the piece of paper. "Hera!" she murmured. "Take me there immediately, bart!"

Bart grabbed her hand and they both zoomed out in super speed.

Which the two boys alone.

Conner never took his eyes off the stunning view of the earth from the satellite.

They were alone in the glass room and near the teleporters, where they could have the full view of the earth as it was spinning and giving life to its residents.

Unable to control his curiosity, Tim stepped forward and looked up at the other boy. "Beautiful view, huh?" he murmured.

Conner nodded silently, never taking his eyes off the scene in front of him. Tim let him be, Tim was never good with words either way.

Conner seemed uncomfortable, he was fidgeting with his hands alot and his breathing was heavy. Tim raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "Is something wrong?" he asked, afraid that the clone might be somehow hurt while in the watchtower.

"No. The earth is just... Different from the photos cadmus showed me." He murmured softly and looked around. His eyes landed on Tims grey eyes. "It's... Beautiful."

Tim gave him an understanding smile and hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. "Things often are more beautiful up close." he murmured softly.

Suddenly, Conner frowned and looked away, he angrily crossed his arms and left Tim wondering what angered him so much. "Not everything." Conner said angrily. "Superman for example, is such a--" Conner didn't finish those words, he just sighed loudly.

Tim waited patiently for him to speak. He knew how hard it was to realise your parents- or in Conners case genetical donors- aren't as perfect as you thought they were.

Conner took a deep breath. "Since I opened my eyes on cadmus labs I've been wondering one thing," Conner murmured and turned his gaze to Tims eyes again. "What it's like to be superman."

They stared at each other's eyes for a moment. Tim hadn't seen such dark blue eyes in his entire life.

Conner turned his gaze back to the earth. "They told me how great he was or what a great superhero he was. What a worthy thing it was that I was his clone." Conner said with disgust. "And now I've seen him." Conner said with a frown. "And he doesn't even want me around his family."

Conner's voice was pained, and desperately in need of a friend. Tim had never had friends before but he knew what Dick would have done in this position and Dick always did the best things.

Tim took a deep breath."To be like superman is a worthy aspiration." Tim said and gently pressed his hand against the S shield on the boy's chest. "But like superman, you need a life of your own. Free. Then you'll realise superman's reasons for what he does. You'll do unreasonable things for the ones you love."

Conner only hummed in response.

Tim smiled, happy that his pep talk worked.

Conner looked at him once again. His blue eyes landed on Tims grey ones and stayed there. Tim expected him to look away after a few minutes but he didn't. Slowly, Conner's face formed a smirk.

Conner stepped closer and stared at his eyes with a knowing smirk that made Tim's heart start to beat in his throat. He tried to use batman's technique to make his heartbeat slow down but he couldn't. His entire being was filled with something he couldn't name as he stared at the mischievous blue eyes of the clone.

Conner leaned down, their eyes inches apart and Tims breath was caught in his throat. Tim didn't want to take any chances with superboy so he waited and wondered what Conner was going to do. His thoughts were lost in those blue eyes.

Suddenly Conner leaned back and put a reasonable distance between them, but his smirk didn't fall, neither did the mischief in his eyes. "You were right." he said confidently.

Tim gathered his breath to form words. "For what?" he asked curiously.

"Your eyes... They are more beautiful up close." he said and wandered off to the cafeteria, leaving tim alone in the room.

Tim blushed feverishly and tired to hide it with his hands even though no one was there to see him.

=======

At seventeen, Wayne enterprises was taking too much of his time. As the CEO, he had a lot of things to attend to and even if Tam fox took care of most of it, he still had a lot of work to do or else he'd be swallowed whole by his competitors.

Which is why alone time like this was holy.

He had a free hour after his visit to Wayne Labs and before he had the last meeting with the board. He usually spent that time enjoying the silence in his office and trying to clear his mind.

This time, he didn't have to be red robin or the rightful heir of Bruce Wayne. He didn't have to act and could rest for one sweet hour.

His thoughts were a mess of Red Robin stuff and what he should do with Damian. He spun a blue pen in his hands to keep himself busy.

He even wondered about Mary. After all the stuff with Black mask, she went and never looked back. He wondered how she turned out. Did she follow her dreams and open a bakery or did she choose to study biotechnology like her parents wanted.

Even after all these years, he still wondered how could Mari not feel anything like that. How could she not feel a pull towards people like steph.

Or Kon.

His thoughts went to Kon.

Or rather, how much fun they had in their last cadmus labs busting. Conner was too afraid to take Cassie and Bart with them because he had no idea what was waiting for him. He wanted to go alone but Tim forcefully tagged himself along.

The thought of Conner going headfirst into danger terrified Tim to death.

So they busted the lab and in the end, started talking under the moonlight. Tim's eyes were fixated on the reflection of the moon in Conner's blue eyes and how enthusiastically he talked about crashing the robots with his bare hands. He loved the smile he had on his face when he talked about having superpowers. Conner knew how amazing he was. But he didn't know how horrible his jokes and puns were--

\--everytime Conner said anything, Tim blushed feverishly. And how much Tim wanted to grab that perfect face, press Conners lips to his own and kiss it senseless.

. . .

Tim suddenly dropped his pen.

That cursed thought scared him to his bones. His hands slowly started to shake. He never expected himself to think like that about Conner of all people.

Why not? Conner was a very handsome fellow.

Tim grabbed his head and rested his elbow on the table. "He is my best friend." he told himself reasonably. The silence in the office didn't confirm or deny him. He repeated it. One--two--three times and still the words felt foreign and wrong. Kon was his best friend, how could he start to have feelings for him. He was his best friend.

When repeating the words lost its effect, Tim found a piece of paper and started writing down, maybe if he wrote it enough, he would forget about these feelings.

Kon is just my best friend.

Kon is just my best friend.

Kon is just my best friend.

Kon is just my best friend.

Kon is just my---

=======

Tim wore his most convincing countryside clothes he had and met Conner in the hall of justice. Alfred gave him a box of his cookies and told him to deliver it to Mrs Kent.

Conner was visibly nervous, his nails were chewed and he could barely stand in one place when Tim arrived. Tim waved and got his attention. The plan was simple: they took the Zeta tubes to Smallville and introduced Conner to Ma and Pa Kent, since Superman had refused to do so.

(Bruce had arranged the meeting. "Conner deserves a family even if Clark is too blinded to give him one." he had said.)

Tim playfully punched him in the shoulder when they stood on the platforms and ready to head to metropolis. "What is it with you?" he asked seriously.

"I'm a little bit nervous." Kon admitted quietly.

Tim hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. "There is nothing to be nervous about," he assured him. "Ma and Pa are the kindest people in the world, believe me."

Conner said nothing. The zeta tubes flared to life and teleported them meters away from the Kent farm. When they opened their eyes, they could see plain and plains of freshly bloomed plants.

Conner took a deep breath, enjoying the clean air, Tim could only watch him release all that stress.

"Jonathan! They're here!"

Both of them turned around to see Ma Kent in her strawberry outfit waving at them from the balcony of the house. Tim waved back and Conner took a deep breath.

"Come in, Kids. Come in" she said and pointed at the door. She quickly went inside.

Tim pointed at the red doors. "Well, come on then." he said and started walking on the muddy ground.

He took three steps and realised Conner wasn't following him. He turned around to see Conner was staring at his hands. Scared was written all over Conner's body.

He looked up and stared at Tims blue eyes. "Tim what if-- what if they dont like me?" he murmured anxiously.

Tim sighed loudly and stood next to him. Instinctively, Tim went to lace their fingers together and gently push him towards himself--

\--Suddenly he came to himself and grabbed his elbow instead. And pushed him towards the house.

"It's ok." Tim murmured softly. "Batman has tried to make them hate him on purpose... And yet somehow they still love him."

Conner's eyes widened and he didn't protest.

They reached the door and Tim knocked. Ma opened the door with Pa behind him. She opened the way for them to come in with a wide smile. "Hi there boys." she said.

They both came inside and Ma closed the door behind them.

"Hello Mrs Kent." Conner said politely with a neutral face and a nod.

"Hey Ma." Tim said with a friendly smile.

"Hi kiddo." Ma said and hugged Tim tightly, Tim hugged her back. "Hi Ma." he murmured softly and gently broke the hug, he offered her the box with a smile. "These are from Alfred."

Ma's eyes widened. "Alfred Eh?" he said with surprise.

Pa sighed loudly. "This passive aggressive food fight of yours will kill us one day." he said and crossed his arms.

Ma accepted the box and put it aside. She looked at Conner and a smile appeared on her face. "And you must be Conner. Don't be shy-- come in dear." she said and waved her hand in welcoming motion.

The moment Conner stepped inside Ma took her in a hug that Conner was too shocked to return. "Welcome home." she murmured in her ear. Conner smiled softly and embraced the old woman.

Ma broke the hug and Pa stepped forward with one of his biggest smiles. "Hello son, I'm Jonathan Kent but you can call me Pa." he said and offered a hand. They shook hands. Tim smiled at him from behind Pa and gave him a thumbs up.

Their conversation froze right there and Conners insecurities returned with a vengeance. Ma and Pa knew the signs too well to ignore it. They raised the same person once before after all.

"There is no better way to start a conversation than with a pie." Ma said and pat him on the shoulder. "And guess what? I have one freshly baked." she went straight towards the kitchen to set the table.

Pa pushed the two teenage boys inside and let them sit on the tiny red table in the kitchen while Ma took the pie out of the oven.

Ma and Pa sat next to Conner and Tim sat in front of them. Tim knew he was here just for moral support but he had a strange feeling about it. Conner wanted him to be here, in the most important day of his life so far.

"Oh, tell us everything about yourself, from the start." Ma said and put some pie for the two of them and sat down.

Kon stared at the apple pie in confusion. He waited for Tim to eat the pie first as if to know if there are any special customs he doesn't know about pie eating. When Tim took the first bite so did he.

Conner took a deep breath and started. "Well uhm I'm superboy, a cadmus clone. Made from DNA acquired from superman--"

He was interrupted by Ma who put her hand on Conners. "We know that already." she said softly. Pa joined her and held his other hand.

"We want to know who you are-- not what you are." he said gently.

Conner was too shocked to talk, but then, he smiled. "well... I like football." he said. "And fighting giant robots."

Both of them laughed. "You take that from Clark." Pa said while laughing. "He set the farm on fire once fighting with one of Luther's robots."

Conner smiled and started telling about himself, about how much he loved Hawaiian food and about cadmus. He told them all about his new school in Metropolis and about his friends and their team.

Tim could stay like this forever, listening to Kon-El-- No,Conner-- talk about his passion for Hawaiian beaches or enjoying his new powers and the taste of freshly baked pie in his mouth. Tim could stay and enjoy this moment until it ended.

=======

"Hey, Tim. Are there going to be any sudden missions from Batman this weekend?" Kon asked with a smile.

Tim stopped typing and raised an eyebrow at his friend. "None that I know of," he answered. "Why are you asking?"

"Nothing, I just want to ask Cassie out on a date and I want to make sure there is no world ending matter while we're enjoying our first date."

Tims heart almost stopped. He slowly closed the laptop with shaking hands. He tried to calm down before he said anything. "So you've.... Asked her out?" Tim said through gritted teeth. If he held the laptop a little bit tighter it might have broken.

Kon shrugged it off. "Pfff. No. Not yet. I'll ask her tonight. Do you think she'll say yes?"

(Please no.)

"Sure. Of course. Totally, she'll say yes." Tim said with the best fake smile he could muster. "It's Cassie we're talking about, she's been giving you hints since you first met."

Another lie he didn't know why he said.

His face beamed with laughter and Conner took tim in a fierce hug. Conner almost levitated them both off the ground out of excitement.

Tims hands were slightly shaking when he returned the hug. Tim didn't fight his instincts and rested his head against Conners shoulder for the moment the hug lasted.

It didn't last long.

Conner broke the hug, his face still had that huge smile. "You're the best, buddy." he said and dashed off.

Tim couldn't make his eyes focus on anything until minutes after Conner left. He was standing there, not moving and trying to process the moment. He took a deep breath to calm his beating heart down but failed.

He felt like he had run a marathon and now he was falling down an endless abyss.

Tim closed his eyes and fisted his hands. He forced himself to sit down, he forced himself to open the laptop and forced himself to continue his work.

=======

Conner's birthday came around the corner in a week.

As expected Cassie had said "yes" to be his girlfriend and made this surprise party especially for him.

Tim couldn't complain. It was a wonderful party in smallville. Ma and Pa gladly gave their house to be a place for the party and The decorations came in all colors. The cake- naturally- was a superman cake. Tim wanted to laugh at the irony.

Even Jon, Lois and Clark attended. After years, Clark finally gave in and introduced Jon and Conner.

Tim watched happily as Conner took Jon for a flight. Jon couldn't fly at the time and Clark was too cautious to take him for a ride. Conner put him on his back and took Jon for a tour around Smallville so that Jons first flight would be with Conner. He quickly came back to the party and blew the candles like nothing had happened.

However, Tim couldn't bring himself to start dancing with the others after that. He leaned against the wall and watched everyone losing themselves on the dance floor.

His strange behavior didn't go unnoticed.

Bart was so busy filling his stomach with Junk food but not busy enough to forget about his friend. "Hey are you alright?" he asked quietly while stuffing his mouth full of chips. Tim chuckled and nodded. "I have business back in gotham, that's all."

Bart punched him in the shoulder. "Chill, dude, it's Supey's birthday." he cheered and put a hand around his neck in a friendly manner. "I know it's hard for bat people to chill but you gotta try it every once in a while."

"Tt." Tim snorted.

Bart let go immediately. "Oh no. Oh no. You're turning into the demon spawn." he said with horror.

"Bart!"

"Ha ha just kidding." Bart said loudly and punched him in the shoulder. "Crime fighting can stop for a while." Bart said and devoured the rest of his soda. "Have some fun."

Tim pressed his lips together and smiled. He looked around the room and unconsciously, his eyes landed on the new couple.

Conner and Cassie were talking to Donna but their hands were laced together and they were looking at each other in such a loving way Tim had to look away. His eyes landed on the marble grounds.

"Yeah." Tim answered Bart. "But not tonight."

He didn't say anything as he left the party. He didn't even excuse himself or say goodbye to Ma and Pa. Ma was supposed to give him the next round in "Alfred and Ma's passive aggressive baking tournament."

He went to the barn and walked until the sound of the party was nothing but background music.

He took a very deep breath and called the watchtower teleporters to teleport him back to gotham.

When he made it home, He didn't say anything else to the residents of Wayne manor except: "it was fun."

That night he coughed up blood but he didn't have the energy to care for himself. He put his head on a pillow and hoped for the best.

Tim didn't get a night's sleep. He woke up several times, he violently coughed up blood every time his eyes were open.

And yet, he didn't seem to care.

=======

Lately, Dealing with Damian has taken so much of his time and energy. Tim had to constantly watch his back for any sudden attacks and couldn't patrol with him alone for the sake of safety.

Tim suspected Damian's anger was because of Dick and Bruce's latest fight which resulted in Dick storming out of the house. Tim saw Damian watching the fight. The longing in Damians eyes when he watched Dick leave the manor made Tims heart ache a little.

Tim wanted to comfort Damian but he lashed out and started screaming at him for no reason.

Dick was Damian's favorite person in the family, after all. Losing him wasn't an easy feat.

Cassandra and Bruce had left for her Ballet performance. Bruce insisted that he must see the theatre first before he allowed her child to perform in it. After all, Being Bruce Waynes only daughter came with complications.

Which left Tim and Damian alone.

Tim was peacefully doing his paperwork in the living room when he suddenly felt something grabbing his throat and cutting off his airway.

He was overwhelmed with a violent streak of coughs. He held his hand in front of his mouth and realised he was coughing up blood and in fact, he wasn't dreaming about that last night.

Tim rushed to the bathroom. He bumped into Damian in the hallways but didn't stop to argue, which surprised Damian."Drake?" he whispered as Tim raced to his bathroom and locked the door behind him.

Damian walked to the door and knocked politely. "Drake!" he shouted loudly.

"Go away Damian!"

Tim's voice was desperate and scared. His voice was similar to the times he was infected with fear toxin, sharp and surprised.

Damian drew back his hand and took a deep breath before heading back to his own room.

He returned shortly after.

Damian stared at the wooden doors for a few seconds and tasted his own words a few times. His hands hesitantly hovered above the doorknob before he knocked loudly.

"Drake, you've been in there for an hour! I can't care less but you better be well when father arrives." he said loudly.

Damian knew he should have been kinder. He should have used kinder words and generally left him alone when he wanted to be. But he didn't know how. Being violent was the only thing he was taught at a young age and at this point, it was the only approach he knew.

"I know." was all the answer he got from Tim Drake.

Inside the room, Tim was sitting down on a corner and holding a delicate flower petal in his hand. He had coughed so much, his throat was sore and now, a red petal had come out of his mouth and scared the life out of him.

Tim couldn't take his eyes off the red petal. He laughed nervously as he crushed it in his hands.

His phone was lying a few feet away, he'd done some research the moment he knew where the flower petal came from. The screen showed only a few words. Tim couldn't hold his emotions anymore and had thrown the phone across the room when he read it:

""Hanahaki:

The term hanahaki comes from the Japanese words hana (花), which means "flower", and hakimasu (吐きます), which means "to throw up”. Hanahaki Disease is a disease in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. It ends when the beloved returns their feelings (romantic love only; strong friendship is not enough), or when the victim dies. It can be cured through surgical removal, but once surgery is undergone, the victim loses all feelings of affection (both romantic and platonic) towards their loved one. And if the surgery is done on the later stages the patient will become incapable of any feeling of affection towards anybody.

The victim's lungs get filled with the flowers and roots grow in their respiratory system. It often develops over months or even years, beginning with coughing up a few petals and growing in intensity (and pain) until the victim is vomiting entire flowers, by which point the disease has entered its final stages. The rate at which the disease worsens and spreads throughout the body is specific to the individual. The longest case was Danielle Chamberlain (1801 - 1834) who had it for 10 years and the shortest case was Akai Shimizu (1914 - 1931) who died after two weeks.""

Tims nervous laughter died down quickly. He spinned the red flower petal with his fingers and leaned his head back against the wall.

He closed his eyes. The flower petal was still warm against his skin. It was a red Carnation. It meant, in pure irony, "Alas for my poor heart" or "my heart aches"

His heart did truly ache. His heart ached for all the times he spent with Conner and he could have done something. His heart ached for all the times he was going to lose now that Conner was dating cassie. His heart ached for all the hints he refused to give Conner because he was afraid to fall in love again.

And his heart really was poor because it was for Tim and Tim didn't know how to love.

Well, he was screwed.

=======

He gave himself a year to live with the flowers in his chest. He made a to do list and decided to be done with it.


	2. There is no running from the truth

_**"MY TO DO LIST:** _

_*** ~~do a fun activity~~** _

~~_***find a better CEO for Wayne enterprises.** _ ~~

~~_***Eat an ice cream.** _ ~~

_**Forget it, I have no idea what I'm supposed to do"** _

Tim leaned back on his chair in the office. Red Carnation flowers had fallen all over his table. Tim was panicking at the thought of others finding it out so he had cleaned it as quickly as he could.

His eyes landed on a photo on his desk. A photo taken a very long time ago in simpler times. A selfie with Robin and superboy where Robin was characteristically frowning at the camera. Tim hovered his hand above Superboy and his unique smile.

Tim smiled bitterly at the memory.

Red Carnations. Fate couldn't be much cruel, Could it?

=======

He had no plans for the weekend and his hanahaki was making him regret not doing anything and not "living his life to the fullest" but he wasn't in the mood to do anything.

That made him hate himself more.

He was sitting peacefully in his room and hating himself in silence. His mind was slowly filling with every wrong thing he'd ever done in his life or the things he could have done and didn't.

The morning light barely reached his room from the thick curtains and Tim covered his eyes with his hands to block whatever light that had managed to reach inside.

The silence was broken by Alfreds polite knock. Alfred came in and stood next to the bed. Tim sat up and tried not to look confused anf utterly sleep deprived

Alfred smiled down at him."It's for you, master Tim." Alfred said calmly and handed him a phone. Some one was obviously on the other side and Tim was in no mood to talk to anyone. Tim nagged quietly as climbed out of his bed. "Who is it?" he asked quietly.

"Mary white from Central City." Alfred stated. "And she's quite distressed."

"Mary?" Tims eyes widened and he took the phone. Tim neared the phone to his ear and tried to get his voice as cheerful and happy as possible when he said:"Hey, Mary! Wa'ssup?"

However, Marys voice broke down immediately. Tim could only hear sobs and uneven breathing from the other side. Horrified, He looked at Alfred and Alfred shook his head. "I told you she was distressed." he said as a matter of fact. Alfred left them in peace and closed the door. 

Tim was left with more questions than answers. He slowly got his attention back to the other side of the phone call again. Where Mary was breathlessly crying.

"Hey Mary... deep breaths... What's-- what happened?" He said slowly. "Deep breaths... In... Out... In... Out..."

He could hear trying to regain her breathing and fail. "My-- My-- mom... Dad..." she murmured and hiccuped.

Tim knew she was too out of it to talk. Mary was panicking on the other side. She could barely breathe in and out.

In reality, Somehow the Central City police shoved her phone in her hand and expected her to make an intelligent conversation after seeing her parents being slain infront of her and waking up from a one week coma.

"Just--- just come here." she pleaded. "Please."

How could he say no? Besides he didn't have anything better to do.

Central city was less than three hours away with his bike. it would take only five seconds to get there via zeta-tubes instant teleportation. Tim wanted to clear his mind a little bit and give Mary some time to calm down so he chose the road.

He showed hismelf at breakfast table and told everyone he had to leave for central city. Every body wished him farewell expect Damian who gave him a growl and a frown. God knows whats really going on inside that kids brain.

Tim took His civilain motorcycle and went to central city immediately. Mostly to get his head off his Hanahaki and pretend nothing has happened. The clear road to Central City was empty and it made the three hour ride even better.

Even After he left Gothams borders, the stink of the city still followed him. The uneven roads slowly ceased to exist and Tim had to slow down to prevent an accident on the rocky roads. He reached the boulevard soon.

When he was sure no one was following him, he turned on the computer installed in his bike and contacted Oracle. If he was going to treat this like a case, then he might as well take the part.

The green oracle appeared on the small screen and Oracle's voice reached his ears through the sound of the bike. "What's up?"

"I need a little information on Maria camila Smith she goes by Mary Smith." Tim stated. "What has happened to her recently? And give me her current location."

"Why do you need A civilians Data." Oracle asked angrily. Tim could hear her typing so she was doing what he asked but not with a good heart.

"She's a friend. She was too out of it to talk on the phone." Tim murmured and took the turn that went tp central city.

Central city slowly appeared in his vision. Tall skyscrappers and colorful buildings shone under the sun's light. Tim wasn't used to all these colors and light.

"Maria white." Oracle recited. "She was found unconscious in a top secret STAR labs faculty next to her dead parents. Police found the killer dead from an overdose of drugs about 24 hours later. Her parents worked with dangerous chemicals and had to be buried immediately afterwards while Maria was still in a coma. Her parent's were working on project C.A.S.E. another project aimed to study human Metagenes. They were targeted by mob but the police never found the one pulling the strings."

Tim hummed. "Undrestood." he said.

"Here's her phones location. You can find her easily like this."

Tim smiled. "Thanks O."

"Welcome. Oracle out."

Tim had reached the city without accidents. He took a stop and waited to find the best route to Mary's location. Tim followed it and after a few minutes, he reached saint thomas church. Tim waited and stared for a few seconds at the superb church infront of him. The white family Never really struck him as religious-- One might as well call Mr white an atheist for all the critism he did about religional beliefs-- but here he was. Standing infront of one of Central Citys biggest churches.

He put on a pair of sunglasses and stepped inside. There wasn't anyone in the entrance or the hallways. He followed the locator on the phone and reached the main hall. He didn't need to look at the locator again.

There, sitting on endless rows of wooden chair, was a girl with big curly blond hair. Tim could only see her back but he knew It was Mary the first time he layed eyes on her.

Tim stayed in the shadows and decided to inspect her from a distance for a while. This Mary might be completely different from the Mary he knew as a kid. She might be dangerous.

"But she needs someone and she probably doesn't have anyone." a small part of his brain murmured. "She was there for you when no one else was, remember?"

Right, he owed that naughty Girl from across the streets who wouldn't shut up about how amazing mythology was. He owed that to the girl who always made sure to invite her to their house on stormy nights.

He aproached where she was sitting. Mary never took her eyes off the view infront of her.

Tim took a deep breath and convinced himself it was just another case. "Mary White." Tim said and left the shadows. He took a step to the lights at the exact moment Mary turned around. The colorful lights painted his face and Mary could finally see her old friend. Which made her smile bitterly.

"Tim Drake-Wayne." she retaliated and stared at his eyes. Tims dark shades the only thing between them. "I never thought I'll hear from you again."

Tim hummed and sat next to her. "Me too." he murmured.

Mary chuckled bitterly and looked. "Sorry about that." she whispered. "I just didn't know who else to call..."

Tim leaned back against the chair and stared at the roof of the church. "Its ok... It was nice hearing from you again... Although I wish it was under better circumstances."

Mary took a deep breath and pointed at where the pastor normally stood. "The pastor told me their ceremony was yesterday. They didn't even wait for me to wake up." she said with an angry smile her breath cought in her throat and she tried to control her breathing once again. Tim could see the unshed tears in her eyes. "My own parents... And I missed their..."

A tear escaped her eyes and she quickly covered it. Tim didn't know how he must respond so he did it the way Red Robin would.

"They couldn't wait. The chemicals they worked with came with... Complications..." Tim said as a matter of fact. He'd read that from the file Oracle recited for him on the ride. He also knew The police found their killer dead from an overdose of drugs.

Mary put on a smile again, a clearly fake one and looked at Tim. "I see you did your research." she murmured.

Tim nodded. "I did." he said.

Mary closed her eyes. "I quit STAR labs today." she whispered. "I don't want to be the part of this game without proper protection anymore." there a hint of remorse in her voice. She then burried her face in her hands and shook her head. "There was an attack on STAR labs and We were there. I was knocked out pretty quickly but I could see the whole thing happening. It felt like being a passenger in my own body."

Mary looked and angrily moved her face. "Somehow the info about project C.A.S.E that my parents were working on had leaked away and a masked thief with high Tech weaponry thought he could just barge in and---"

She stopped. She bit her tongue and stopped talking about that night. "Im sorry. Im sorry I dragged you here after all this time I just..." Mary murmured and gripped her bag tightly. "... Didn't know who else to call."

The church was still empty at this point. Mary leaned back against the wooden chairs and closed her eyes. "Thanks for being here, Tim."

Tim just nodded and gently and hesitantly put his hand on hers, just like how she always did all those years ago.

~

Tim gave her a lift to her house. Mary wanted to invite him in but found out she couldn't even step inside the house. She just stared at the door handle and realised she couldn't bear living in that house all alone.

Tim knew the signs. "Is there any other place you can go?" he asked.

Mary nodded. "My aunts... But its in Gotham." she stated. Mary massaged the bridge of her nose and sighed. "I can't go in there. I don't have my job in here anymore... Now that I think about it... Maybe I should move back to gotham for a while... I can't stay here." Mary murmured while toying nervously with her curly blonde hair.

Tim smiled and went back to his bike. He picked up the extra pink helmet and tossed it to her. "Well, that's where Im going, Wanna join me then?" he offered.

Mary weighed her optioned. She bit her lip and Mary put her Helmet on. "Only if we stop for ice cream." she said and hopped on she put her Phone and ID cards in her pocket and threw her bag away infront of the house.

Tim raised an eyebrow before putting on his own helmet. "Won't you need anything?" he asked and started the engine.

"No!" she said loudly. "Besides, I have a digital copy of everything I need in my phone, all I need now is to get away from this place..."

Tim was more than happy to comply. He went top gear and speeded through the streets of Central until they were going top speed on the straight long rode to Gotham city.

=======

Tim's Hanahaki developed far more quickly than he thought it would. Within a week, he was coughing up 20 flower petals a day and he could feel the cold roots moving in his ribcage.

Tim swallowed all the pain and continued as usual. He didn't want anyone finding out, especially his family. He couldn't deal with their grief right now... Or ever. The thought of them finding out and trying to cure him by forcing him to get the surgery early on or worse, confessing, put him under too much pressure.

Breathing became more and more painful everyday, To the point he couldn't stop coughing at a WAYNE enterprises meeting. Tam Fox insisted to postpone the rest of the meeting for the next two weeks. Everyone else agreed but Tim couldn't let it happen, this was an important negotiation with LexCorp and he couldn't let it slip. Besides, he didn't know if he was going to live until next two weeks or not.

If he was going to pass away, he wasn't going to leave anything unattended.

The Meeting ended. He bid farewell to the board members with a fake smile on his face. The last person to leave was Tam fox. She waited in front of the door and held the door handle carefully. He waved soundlessly at her, waiting for her to leave.

But she didn't. she just raised an eyebrow and looked confused. "Are you all right?" Tam asked curiously.

"Yeah Im fine." Tim answered. "Just tired."

Tam nodded and slowly walked out and closed the door behind her. Unconsciously she turned off the lights while going away, leaving Tim alone in the darkness.

His only source of light was the window where the streetlight and moonlight shone inside. Tim wanted to laugh. Tam did that out of habit because she was always the last person to leave.

Well, not tonight.

Suddenly, the coughs started. His throat ached from coughing too much but soon a bunch of petals fell into his hands. The red petals were stained with dark red blood, his blood. Tim's lungs were probably fully embraced by the roots of the Red Carnation flowers by now.

Tim lazily slumbed back on his chair and held the flower petals in his hands. "So you want to kill me?" he murmured softly. The silence of the room didn't answer.

Tim took a deep breath and gently threw all of the red petals in the trash can. He watched them dance in the air and fall down, they were almost a full flower now. He knew the risks, if he coughs up a full flower, the surgery will make him incapable of ever loving anyone again.

He'd be just like his parents.

Tim wanted to throw up because of that thought.

He leaned back against his chair and turned around to see Gothams view from his window, it was nighttime and the moon was shining its silver lights over the dark city. A few tall towers stood out to the rest. A few of them were residential and he could clearly see wayne tower and the apartment that he had convinced Bruce to give Mary for the time being. To everyone's surprise, the sky was clear and the bat signal was off.

Which meant it was a holiday for the batfamily.

They may or may not have busted every single one of Gotham's rouges one by one last week and made sure they'd all be too out of shape to escape Arkham Asylum because tonight was very special.

And Tim was very late.

He panicked when his eyes landed on the clock. It was 8:30, he was supposed to meet the others at the manor an hour ago. He jumped up and threw whatever it was on the table in his hand bag and tried to close it with his weakened hands when he heard someone politely knock at his door.

"Not now! Busy." he said loudly and picked up his hand bag to leave.

The door opened and Cassandra stepped inside. Tim almost paled. "Cass!" he said with shock. "Why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be heading for gotham theatre? It's your Ballet performance."

She smiled, her brown eyes searching the dark room before turning on the lights. "Family." she said softly. "Came for you." Tim could see her in a hoodie and jeans clearly now. The sudden brightness stung Tims eyes for a moment so he looked away. Cassandra stepped closer. "My ballet." she said and gently touched her fingers to his forehead. "You didn't forget." she said as a matter of fact. Tim sighed loudly and nodded.

"Of course, how can I ever forget." Tim said with a smile. "The meeting just took longer than I expected. Why are you here Cass? you'll be late. It's your first public performance, aren't you nervous?"

Cassandra shook her head and grabbed his elbow to pull him downstairs and all the way to the limousine where every one else was waiting.

Bruce and Dick were talking outside while Damian was sitting inside the car and resting his head against the window frame. Tim was surprised to see Dick and Bruce acting civil again in such a short amount of time but he said nothing and awkwardly waved at his family.

Damian looked up at him with a frown. "I told you drake will be late." Damian nagged quietly. Dick just ruffled his hair and gently pushed his head back inside the car. "Let's get going." Dick said with a smile aimed towards Cassandra. "We have your favorite brother. Happy now?"

Cassandra just laughed.

Thanks to Alfreds magnificent driving, they reached Gotham's hall on time. They reached there Exactly two hours before the performance so Cass and her friends could hang out and get ready before the main performance.

Everyone except Tim went over to find their seats and have something to eat before it started. Tim stayed back to see if Cass needed any help or translation in the back stage.

He watched everyone move around in colorful clothes. A group of girls were stretching themselves and getting ready while another group were dancing around. The backstage was superb, far bigger than Tim ever expected it to be. It was so full of life that it made Tims heart ache for the joy they had in their lives.

He was thrown out of his thoughts when he felt someone poking him. He turned around and saw Cass in her full dark pink Dress. Cass was still shy about her ballet so Tim wasn't surprised when he saw Cassandra trying desperately to hide her blush.

"Hey, Cass." he said and looked up and down with a smile. "You look stunning. Why have I never seen you in your Ballet outfit before?"

"You're CEO." she said simply.

Tim touched the back of his head. "Yeah, right... I barely get enough time to sleep." he murmured. The reason why he had no time these days wasn't exactly his day job but being WE's CEO really did take a lot of his time.

He wanted to change the subject but he felt the too familiar grip on his throat. All his words were silenced. Tims eyes widened and he forced himself to look away. He started coughing immediately. He could feel the small petal being stuck in his mouth. "Not now, not now." he pleaded silently to himself.

There was no doubt that more flowers would come. He turned away completely, afraid that he might stain Cassandra's perfectly pink dress right before her performance.

Cassandra wanted to reach him but Tim jumped back, holding his mouth shut and keeping the flower petals inside. "Tim?" she asked, nervousness evident in her voice.

"Im fine." Tim answered hurriedly. He wiped the blood on his chin away from the back of his hand. Tim knew Cassandra wouldn't buy it, she knew how to read body language. She knew he was lying.

Tim never turned around or let her see his face. "I'm just a little bit sick, that's all." he said. His voice was changed because of the flowers in his mouth. He didn't wait for her answer. He crushed the flower petals in his hand and ran away. "Break a leg!! I'll be--- back."

Tim ran out of the backstage and hoped Cassandra wouldn't follow. Thankfully she didn't. He tried to find his way to the bathrooms as quiet as possible. When he was sure he was alone in the hallway he stopped covering his mouth with his hand and took a deep breath before the next round of coughs started.

The moment he reached the bathrooms, He started coughing up flower petals. He closed the wooden door of the men's bathroom and the flowers started coming out. Red carnations Fell to his hand. He almost fell down to the ground because he'd lost his balance.

He was lucky he was alone in the bathroom, or else he'd be in so much trouble.

Tims breathing was shallow and heavy. He forced hismelf to take deep long breaths so that he could slow it down after a few minutes. After a while, His body was too tired to hold its own right then so he slowly slipped down.

Tim opened his palm and looked down at the flower petal, a few petals were stick to each other and almost formed a complete flowrr. He closed his eyes. He knew the consequences of throwing up a full flower. At that stage, if he gets the surgery, he'll lose the ability to ever love again.

That wasn't a scenario he wanted to live.

Tim stared at the pristine white walls of the bathroom in front of him and genuinely considered confessing to Conner. He wasn't the only person to ever get Hanahaki, many have gotten it, survived didn't lose themselves in the process.

But he couldn't. No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't force Conner into anything. So he swallowed his sadness and stood up. He cleaned his face and looked at the mirror. He cleaned every evidence of blood and flowers off his clothes and walked out.

When he reached the audience again, the show had already started. He found Damian from his frown easily and went to sit down with the other three men.

Damian eyes him from the corner of his eyes. "You're late, Drake." Damian nagged quietly.

Tim fixed his suit, not looking at Damian. "I know." he murmured softly.

He saw Cass on the stage, spinning and jumping and screaming with her body language. That's why she liked it so much.

Tim was the only person who truly understood how important Ballet really was for Cassandra. It was her way of expressing herself. With Ballet she screamed, Laughed, Cried and expressed herself in ways words never could. He watched his sister the entire night with a smile on his face.

Tim was just glad he lived long enough for Cassandra to see her full family in the audience once.

========

Mary didnt have much to bring into her new apartment in Wayne Tower, she didn't have much money to buy new things after paying Rent either but a fresh start was all she needed right now.

Her apartment was relatively small but had small two rooms, kitchen, living room and a magnificent view of Gothams night.

Tim knew Mary's appartment wouldn't be a very nice place right now but he got two of Mary's favorite energy drinks and decided to pay her a visit. Gotham was dangerous, specially for new comers like her.

There was another secret about Mary, she has known about his superhero life since the very beginning and she hadn't told anyone.

Tim reached the 14th floor and went towards apartment 147. Ironically the door was open.

"Man, how can I ever thank Wayne Tech for what you did." Mary said loudly and put the last box on the floor. "Nicest apartment in gotham."

Tim smiled and knocked politely. Mary almost jumped but relaxed when she was it was Tim.

Tim laughed it off. "This is Gotham, Mary." Tim said and rolled his eyes. "You should keep this door closed at all times."

Mary burst into laughter. "Well, if isn't Mr CEO." Mary said with a genuine smile. "Come in, Come in. Oh man! You remembered!" she pointed at the two energy drinks in his hands.

"Honestly how can I forget?" tim said and rolled his eyes. "You declared this the best energy drink after consuming 4 different bottles at 13!"

Tim stepped inside and closed the door behind him and went towards the kitchen where Mary was trying to set the fridge. She closed the door and looked at him with a smile. "Not that I'm glad to see you but... What brings you here with two energy drinks?" she asked with an unflattered smile.

Tim considered Saying the truth for a few seconds but scarapped the idea immediatly abd settled for the partial truth. "Well Im actually here for... Working purposes." Tim explained and aimlessly waved his hands in circles.

"Working purposes?" Mary murmured and raised an eyebrow. "Annnnd what's that?"

"I read your files and Resume, Mary your work in bio-technology has too much potential to be ignored." Tim said. This was Tim Wayne speaking, trying to make his best out of a situation.

Mary looked away angrily and frowned. "Oh, I knew Wayne tech wouldn't just rent me an apartment." Mary murmured quietly.

Tim sighed loudly and put the energy drinks he'd bought on the kitchen counter. "Im sorry... That came out wrong." he said quickly.

Mary nodded and stood infront of him. "No no, Tim it's ok, I get it." Mary said carelessly and swinged the beer. "I need the job anyway. But the real question is... Why are you so down?"

Tim picked one of the energy drinks and tossed Mary the other. "I'm sorry, i didn't know how I should start a conversation any other way... And It's a long story." he admitted and took a sip from the monster drink.

Mary hoped on the table and opened her own. "Is that why you brought energy drinks?" she asked.

"Hey! You were the one who sneaked two monster drinks into school for us to eat when we were 11." Tim accused her. "You had a passion for these caffeinated sweet drinks."

Mary rolled her eyes. "Oh whatever..." she nagged and took another sip. "I have so much to do until morning. I have to decorate this entire apartment so this-" she held up the energy drink, "- is necessary for me. Anyway, you were talking."

Tim struggled to come up with a lie about why he was down expect the obvious Hanahaki reason. So he just decided to improvise on the way.

"So my sister, Cassandra, had a performance yesterday." he said with a soft smile.

Mary nodded and listened carefully. "So, how did it go?" she asked curiously.

Tim had been awake for the past 48 hours so the control over his speech was slowly slipping away, unconsciously answered: "Tolerable."

Mary raised an eyebrow. "Tim it was your sister's performance." she stated.

"Oh that!" Tim said loudly and hit his forehead. "Yeah yeah, that was amazing."

Mary looked suspicious. She drank another sip without taking her intense stare of off his eyes. Tim blinked a few times. It had been a while before he had confronted the watchfull eyes of Mary white.

As if waiting for a queue. Suddenly his throat felt dry and a violent cough came. Then another. And another. Tim covered his mouth anf started coughing up flowers.

He cursed his luck. This was the first time it happened in public and infront of someone else and he had absolutely no clue what he must do.

The coughs didn't stop. He felt like phantom hands were holding his throat closed. His vision started to blur and he dropped the energy drink. And gripped the cabinets for support.

"Tim!"

He could barely hear Mary. She came over and helped him stay standing. But Tim was going weaker and weaker and he almost collapsed in her arms.

The red bloodied petals fell down on the kitchen floor. Tim couldn't take his eyes off the red petals and wished from th3 depths of his heart that Mary hadn't seen them.

He could feel more coughs coming.

He tried to stand back up on his own again and tried to stay away from Mary. He promised himself he could hide the flowers somehow. He could pass his coughing as a new unknown allergy and as long as he could somehow hide the petals in a tissue no one would find out.

The flowers slowly increased in number and Tim tried to ignore it. He could hide it and thats all that mattered.

"Im fine." Tim said weakly and picked up a tissue to wipe away the blood on his lips.

"What?"

He was overwhelmed when twenty petals just came at once.

He couldn't hide it anymore. The flowers spilled out of his mouth and into The kitchen floor.

Tim closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out. Once he took his breathing under control again and made certain the episode was over, he opened his eyes again.

Mary was terrified.

Her eyes were wide and he was covering her mouth and her eyes could only see the bloody flowers on the ground. They stayed like that for a few minutes. Both of them didn't dare to move.

Tim slowly touched the back of his neck and cleared his throat to speak and failed to find the right words.

Mary closed her eyes and opened them again. She bit the insides of her lip nervously. "Tim... Are you alright?" she murmured.

There was no denying it now. She knew it. He couldn't hide it no matter how much he wanted to. "No." Tim admitted finally. Saying that world outloud made his slight control break. "No, Im not."

Mary tackled him into a bear hug and Tim burst into tears. Mary just gripped him tightly and let him spill the tears out.

Tim couldn't stop the trails of tears. Or the trials of thoughts. Thoughts of Kon and Cassie and how happy they were or how Tim had all those opportunities to confess and didn't.

How he had no right to complain.

He just stayed there and let it out.

"Of all the people you could have chosen to fall in love with," Mary murmured and gently stroked his hair while Tim tried to regain his shallow breathing. "You chose the one that won't love you back."

Why did he hate himself that much? He truly didn't know.

========

Tim could barely breath the next day. As he lay sleeping in his king sized bed and sunlight lazily lit the room, he considered screaming for help and asking to be taken to a hospital. Although When he tried, barely any voice left his mouth except a painful whimper.

His lungs felt heavy and full. He was drowning right in his own bed where he always felt safest. He forced himself to sit up and breathe regularly, Alfred would come in a few minutes and call him for breakfast.

His eyes landed on the red streaks of blood and red Petals on his pillow and he sighed loudly. Hiding his Hanahaki was getting harder and harder by the second.

His phone buzzed. He had a new message, Tim lazily stretched his hand and picked it up. There was a message from Bart. He didn't want to answer so he just read the notification so that Bart wouldn't know he'd seen it.

B. Allen : "Hey buddy, whats up?"

B. Allen : "Is everything fine? Haven't heard of you for a while."

Tim slammed his head back to the pillow. Why did he hope it was from Conner? Of course it was Bart and not Conner. Conner had something more important to do on the other side of the world.

Tim didn't answer him but it got him thinking. Did Bart know anything about his future? Was something concerning his future.

Probably, why else would Bart call?

He took a deep breath. His future was his own to make and if he wanted to make it better he really had to get out of his bed.

He took a quick shower and went down for breakfast. Since it was Sunday, Dick had come all the way from Bludhaven to Gotham for breakfast and would stay there until lunch before going back to his home.

Those were Alfreds rules and nobody broke Alfreds rules.

Damian was in a heated conversation with Dick about a recent metahuman he confronted while bruce was reading newspaper silently. Cassadra was staring at the waffles and waiting for their last memeber to arrive. When he sat on his place on the table, Next to Cassandra, everyone were already ready to eat. Alfreds Waffles were a true blessing.

"So how's it going, Damian?" Dick asked. He knew exactly how it was going he just wanted Damian to open up to the rest of the family as well.

Damian shrugged carelessly. "Nothing new." he murmured. "This stupid school project is taking too much of my time."

Bruce hummed. "Well you picked up a very hard project, Damian. But I'm sure you and Colin will do great."

Damian pressed his lips to a thin line to avoid smiling and nodded.

Colin was still a sore subject. Nobody wanted to talk about how Damian kidnapped him from the orphanage when they wanted to hang out, Or How Colin wilkes is the only child Damian never dubbed as "a waste."

Dick looked at him with a gentle smile. Tim wanted to somehow cover the dark circle under his eyes but he couldn't. Dick didn't like seeing them on his little brother at all but it came with their nightjobs.

When Dick opened his mouth, Tim thought he was going to comment about his lack of sleep again but surprisingly, he didnt "I heard WE won against LexCorp." Dick said with a smile and leaned forward. "Thanks to someone."

Tim froze for a moment and then laughed while playing with his food. "It was nothing. really." Tim said with an awkward shrugg. "Just months worth of allnighters."

Bruce chuckled.

"Its not noting." Bruce said gently. "You put so much work and effort in it. Give yourself a little credit sometimes, Tim."

Cassandra elbowed him gently. Tim sat up straighter and looked at the rest of the family with a smile.

One day, on a breakfast like this. He'd have to tell them about his hanahaki disease. That thought made his smile drop. Tim looked down on his food and didn't meet anyone else in the eye again until the meal was finished.

========

Mary marched into the main Wayne Enterprises building the next Tuesday morning. Tim's Secretary let her in after she got the permission.

Mary slammed the door open and came in without a word. Mary walked all the way to Tims table on his carpets and paid no mind to All the blue and gold decorations in Tims office or the magnificent view.

She put a small box on his table without saying one word and slid it over to Tim. Tim slowly put aside the papers he was working on and accepted it soundlessly. Confused at Marys strange behaviour, he picked it up and inspected the box throughtly. It was medical pills.

"Hanahaki control pills." Tim read. His eyes widened and he stared at Mary with shock.

~~~

 _Two Years ago_ :

_Mary didn't talk him all day in school and didn't try to come bugging him after school. So Tim, just this once, broke the tradition and he went to find Mary instead of the other way around._

_He knocked politely at their door and Mr. white opened the door with a smile and let him in. He told Tim Mary was in her room and if they needed anything they can just call. Tim nodded politely and went upstairs._

_Mary's room was a mess. Her books were everywhere on the ground and the various pictured of mythological creatures had falled from the wall. Tims froze infront of the room for a few seconds and watch Mary sit in the middle of her bed, hugging her knees._

_Tim closes the door behind him and cautiously stepped inside and sat on her bed silently. He waited for her to start speaking. Which wasnt much._

_Mary tapped his shoulder to get his attention. "I think-- I think Im Aromantic." Mary said quickly. "I dont feel Romantic attraction towards anyone. And i don't want to date people. Ever."_

_Tim just hummed and looked back at the wall. "Is that what made you anxious?" he murmured. Mary shook her head and saif a simple:"No."_

_Tim didn't want to pressure her any further._

_However, this looked like a perfect opportunity to confess a secret that had been bugging him out for a while. Tim looked at Mary with a half smile. "How about I return a secret." Tim whispered_

_Mary nodded curiously. Her brown eyes didn't leave his grey ones._

_"Im Bisexual." Tim finished._

_Mary punched him in the shoulder. "Good for you." she murmured. "You don't have any mythical responsibilities."_

_Tim raised an eyebrow in confusion and Mary rolled her eyes angrily. She had a book on her knees, she opened a bookmarked page, her hands hovered above the letters._

_"They say the reason they call Aromantics "Aros" which sounds very much like "Arrows" is because... Legend says, they finished off their companions who had hanahaki with an arrow to the heart. that was considered honorable becouse Hanahaki is a very painfull illness." Mary said and shoved the myth storybook in Tim's face. "Like... If you ever get hanahaki, It's my responsibility to stab you with an arrow."_

_Mary drew the book back and closed it. She hugged it tightly and looked at tim. "But I don't want to lose a companion to Hanahaki. There must be another way."_

_Tim blinked a few times and burst into laughter. "Seriously? That's what youre worried about? Hanahaki is one case per a million people, the chances of someone you know getting hanahaki is very low."_

_Tim laughed it off and elbowed her. "Haha, you're funny." Tim said mockingly, "besides, you can't even land a punch on me, let alone stab me with an arrow."_

_He got an angry growl as a response._

~

Mary closed Tims hands around the small box, a bitter smile on her face. "Take one everyday." she instructed. "It'll relieve your coughs for a while and slow down the illness."

Tim bit his lip nervously. "But how did you get them?" he asked nervously. "Did anyone see you?"

Mary drew back and shook her head. "No one saw me. Your secret is safe with me, Tim." she murmured quietly. "I Pretended your exact same symptoms and for privacy reasons they gave me the medicine."

Tim looked at her eyes. He could see the fear in her eyes. A small childhood fear that she never truly grew out of. Tim closed his mouth and nodded.

"Thanks." he said and put the box in his pocket.

Mary smiled and hestitanly put a hand on his shoulder. "Don't think you can die on me like that boy wonder." she murmured quietly.

========

It didn't take conner long to call him.

Tim was shocked when he got the call. He stated at his phone Id for a couple fo minutes before he answered the call with trembeling hands. The sound of his ringtone was echoing in the old manor and soon someone would get suspicious.

He cleared his voice and closed his eyes before he simply said: "hey conner."

"Hi Tim, I uh... Need to ask for a favor."

Oh of course. A little bit disappointed, Tim said: "what is it?"

"So uhm... Clark finally gave in and wants me to babysit Jon while him and Lois are away for work."

"Really?" Tim asked. Clark never trusted anyone to babysit Jon. Maybe the batfamily to some extent but the other... Not so much.

"Yeah... But he said the only way he'll allow it is if we stayed with Ma and Pa... Or if you come with me."

Clark... Tim's going to kill Clark.

"Clark said you have a sharp mind that will detect dangers sooner than I do so... Is it you or should I talk with Ma and Pa."

Don't do it.

Don't do it.

Don't--

Tim smiled at the phone to make his tone more realistic. "Sure." he said happily. "When and where?"

"Two O'clock, Clark and Loises house!" Conner shouted from the other side of the phone. "Man you're the best. See ya!" he said and ended the call.

~

Tim reached the house twenty minutes earlier and spent all of that twenty minutes, fidgeting nervously and debating with himself wether he should or shouldn't take his hanahaki meditation. He'd researched it thoroughly and found out these pills didn't need a doctor's approval to be taken. Tim closed his eyes and swallowed the Hanahaki pill and hoped for the best. He couldn't risk Conner finding out now... Or ever.

He slowly walked to the red and white hosue and saw Conner and Jon playing in the yard. He waved and both of them saw him. "Tim!" Conner shouted. "Ive been hearing your hearbeat for half an hour what were you doing back there?"

"Nothing in particular." Tim lied and they did their famous hand shake. Tim gently ruffled Jon's uneven hair.

Jon wanted to say something but the phone inside the house started ringing. He glanced at Conner and went to answer the phone.

Conner pushed Tim inside the house after him and closed the door. "How are you, dude. I haven't heard of you in weeks!"

Tim laughed awmwardly. "Gotham stuff keeps us busy you know" he reasoned. Against his better judgement, he crossed his arms and asked: "how are you and Cassie doing?"

Conner froze for a minute before putting up a brave face and smiling. "Honestly. Its going great, Man." he said.

Tim detected the lie but he didn't point it out or allow his crippled sense of happiness get the better of him.

Tim was about to pressure him into confessing more when Jon walked inside of the room with the most nervous Tim had ever seen him. He gripped his hair anf breathed heavily.

Jon looked at Conner with horror but didn't say anything. Tim knew Jon wouldn't say anything unless they directly asked him what was wrong so he stepped in. "Jon, is everything alright? Who was it on the phone."

"Nope." Jon said and shook his head. His calculating eyes never left Conner. "If was from school."

Conne crossed his arms. "Why would your school call on a sunday?"

"So uhm... I might have... Accidentally hit a bully." Jon confessed.

"How do you accidentally hit someone?" Tim asked nonchalantly.

Jon ignored the question. "And the school wanted me to bring an adult." he said awkwardly. "And I kind of forgot to tell mom and dad."

Conner froze momentarily. "I don't like the sound of this..." he whispered. Tim wanted to laugh.

"And I really have go get someone and..." Jon shrugged awkwardly. "You count as an adult."

Conner blinked a few times. "Come again?" he asked quietly. Tim bit his lip trying not to laugh. Jon was tomato red at this point and waa fidgeting nervously with his hands.

"You must come to my school and talk to our principal." Jon blurted out. "Pretty much now."

Conner almost flew out of the house almost in that instant. If Tim hadn't read his body languege and gripped Conners elbow as hard as he could, stopping him from flying away from his responsibilities.

Which is how he ended up here. Tim was Leaning against the wall of Clarks old room while Conner changed into something 'suitable'. His job was to make sure Conner actually dressed normal and not like his usual punk aesthetics.

Jon knew his fate was sealed. Tim wanted to laugh at thr irony, he had never had to go to gotham academy regarding Cassandra or Damian and by the looks of it he never wants to experience the feeling either.

"I can't believe this." Conner shouted every once in a while when Tim said a serious "no!" to his choice of clothes.

Finally, Conner came with a suitable outfit. A plain white shirt anf dark blue pants. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbow and Conner had the presence of mind to take off his earings this time. A black tie was loosely around his neck.

He stepped out of the room and opened his arms, waiting for Tims reaction. Tim marveled the sight of Conner in normal clothes and actually failed to give an answer on time.

He wanted to point out that his sleeved shouldn't be rolled up all that much but bit his tongue anf decided maybe, this one time, he can sacrifice that becouse Conner looked so handsome. Tim swallowed heavily and looked away with a nodd.

Conners face beamed into a smile. "Oh thank goodness, finally." he said with a sigh.

Tim shook his head and tried not to look at Conners eyes as he pointed at the loose tie around his neck. He didn't say anything but Conner got what he meant. Conner touched the back of his neck awkwardly and murmured: "I don't know how to get it on. Can you... Fix it for me?"

Tims eyes widened and he genuinely considered Saying no for a minute before ge realised he wears ties all the time, Conner would know he's lieing without even using his powers.

Tim nodded. "Here, I'll fix it for you." he said confidently and stood infront of him and picked up the black tie and started to work. He had done it so many times as Tim Wayne that it came naturally at this point but he slowed down unconsciously, dragging the moment as much as he could.

Tim tried not to take his eyes off the tie and tried not to look at Conners sky blue eyes. Becouse their faces were inches apart and if he did he could never break his gaze again.

Unconsciously, Tim inched forward and his hands hit that perfect body more than it should. Tim tried to get his attention back on the tie and realised he did ghe knot incorrectly, becouse of the lack of attention, and started over.

"Too close, Too close" ringed in Tims mind but he took a deep breath and tried to calm down his thrubbing heart.

When he finished, the tie was fit and perfect against Connors outfit. His hand hovered above his body for a moment before Tim looked up at him. Blue eyes met grey ones and Tim hesitantly stepped back.

Tim hoped with the depth of his heart that the warm feeling he had on his face wasn't a blush.

Conner didn't seem to even understand.

Conner looked at himself in the mirror with a smile and then looked at Tim. "Thanks dude!" he said and punched him in the shoudler a little too hard. Tim rubbed it gently and nodded.

Suddenly, Conners smile fell. "Dude, are you alright?" he asked.

Tims eyes widened a little bit and he jumped bacl clumbsily. "Yeah! Yeah! Why do you ask??" he said, trying to act confident.

"I don't know man, your heart is going like crazy." Conner said pointed at where tims heart was supposed to be.

Needless to say, it got worse. "Its nothing." tim murmured quietly and headed downstairs. "Its a side effect of scarecrows latest fear toxin. It makes the heart go crazy at random."

Conner raised an eyebrow. Tim decided to change the subject immediately. "Why do you need a tie anyway?" Tim said loudly and jumped down the stairs, running away from the tension. Jon was waiting for them in the car.

"Dude. Im supposed to be his responsible older brother and I kind of have to look the part too." he said and flew to the car.

The ride was short. They reached Jons school in a few minutes and Tim waved them goodbye with a good heart.

When they were out of his vision, tim took a deep breath and looked in the drivers mirror. "Kon has a girlfriend." he said to himself, looking directly into his own grey eyes. "Kon has a girlfriend, stop this game."

The silence didn't answer him.

~~

Conner and Jon slammed the door behind them. Jon could barely keep his excitement. "You rule, Conner!!" she shouted and shook his brother from the back seat before he started the car.

"Pfft. That was close." Conner sighed and started driving back.

Tim raised an eyebrow and looked at Jon from the drivers mirror. Jon was relaxed abd laying back on his seat like nothing could ever go wrong. "Well what happened?" He asked curiously.

"Kon convinced the entire school staff about how the punch was Joes fault not mine! They suspended him and let me go!" Jon giggled happily.

Conner took a deep breath. "Yeah that was really close." he said and took a few turns to get a short cut through the fields.

Tim laughed and looked around. They were sorounded by farm and crops anf endless raw of corn. A stunning view coupled with the faint light of dusk.

"Congratulations. Then." Tim said with a smile and leaned his head against the door frame.

He felt a pressure down his throat and a few small coughs followed it. Tim was amazed by how the pill had soothed it down. He was panicking at first but then he covered his mouth and let the red petals slowly fall into his hands. When hr was sure it was over, he closed his hand and hit the red petals in his pocket.

Conner was the only one to realise it. "You ok man?" he asked. Tim nodded and carelessly answered: "Just an allergy."

Jon leaned forward so his head was almost between the two friends. "Tim you should be proud." Jon said with a smirk. "Your apprentice did a lot of good detective work."

Tim raised an eyebrow and turned back to see Jon. "Conner." he said with shock. "Did detective work?"

"Yup." Jon nodded. Conner sighed loudly and massaged the bridge of his nose. "You won't believe it, Tim! He asked all about what happened from Mr Langston and then went to check on the hallway and then he realised there was an unusual dent on the locker which meant---"

Tim really wanted to listen to the full story but he dozed out and stared at the plains of corp far too often. He just nodded a few times and acted surprised whenever Jons tone changed. He kept looking at the farm until his eyes picked an unusual square shaped object on comofludge flying in the skies.

He first thought he was hallucinating and payed it no mind but then it appeared again... And this time there was a hint of rapidly growing green to it.

Tims eyes widened and he acted immediately. "OUT! OUT! EVERYONE OUT!" Tim shouted suddenly and conner slammed the breaks. Tim didn't wait for the car ro stop before he pushed Conner and Jon to jump out. he opened the door and jumped out himself.

The green beam hit the car and it exploded in the way. Tim hit the unforgiving ground and rolled a little. He could feel the bruises slowly forming under his skin.

He opened his eyes and tired to regain his shalloe breathing. He first tried to sit up with his hands but he had injured his left arm.

He couldn't hear a sound from Jon and Conner.

He pushed his weak body up the ground and shouted. "Conner!" his voice was desperate and inches away from breaking down. "Conner!" he shouted again, desperate to hear an answer.

His heart was beating rapidly in his chest and he could even hear his own panic. He tried to stand up and look at the flaming car. The green hint was absolutely kryptonite becouse tim could the remains of the green stone on the ground.

He almost stopped breathing. He pushed his body to go near the accident and get a clue about their whereabouts. Tim couldn't stop coming up with tragic scenarios where Conner was injured.

Or worse.

Tim swallowed hard and shouted:"Conner!"

Please be fine.

Please be fine.

PLEASE BE FI--

Conner and jon superspeeded next to him in an instant. Tim blinked a few times and looked around Jon and Conner. Tim couldn't stop himself and took Conner in a desperate hug that Conner was too shocked to return. "You're fine." Tim murmured, tears already forming in his eyes.

"Yeah... I'm fine?" Conner murmured and pat his back. Tim hugged him tighter and didn't wish to let go. That strange moment he thought he'd lost his friend and secret love was enough to kill him from inside out.

"What was that?" Jon asked curiously.

Tim opened his eyes and hesitantly broke the hug. "Kryptonite beam." Tim murmured and swallowed nervously. "And there is more where it-- CONNER LOOK OUT!"

His eyes landed on a strange rectangular object in the skies. Which had a glowing green missle coming at their way.

Tim didn't think, he just jumped and covered Conners body with his own. Kryptonite won't hurt him, but it will kill Conner.

The pain was numbing at first. He saw green light and he couldn't feel his back for a moment until the green light was gone. He fell in Conners arms and started panting heavily

His back burned and he slowly lost his grip on Reality. He could only feel the white hot pain in his back. His sharp mind lost its connection to reality and his vision was reduced to what was directly infornt of him. His eyes felt heavy. Tim barely felt himself losing balance and falling down, Conners hold on him steadying the fall.

Conner held him tightly and slowly lowered him to the ground. His gentle hands were shaking nervously and that was all Tim could feel.

Thinking that was were he was going to die, Tim forced his eyes open. He saw Conners face looking down at him with wide eyes and shocked expresion. "Tim." he whispered softly. Tim didn't know if he was hallucinating or not but Conners eyss were shining with unshed tears. Tim wanted to raise his hand and touch Conners face and gently wipe away the tear.

If that was the last thing he would in this world then so be it. He wanted to touch Conners gentle face and try to comfort him with his last act.

But his hand stopped midway.

And fell back down when the merciful hands of unconsciousness took over. Tims eyes closed and he went completely limb in Conners arms.

Conner was too shocked to speak for a moment he stared at Tims face and expected his eyes to open but it didn't. Tim was completely limb in his arms. "Tim..." Conner whispered quietly and clinged into the unconscious form of his friend.

Conner closed his eyes, Tim's steady heartbeat grounded him and soothed his worries a little. Tim was alive, Tim was breathing and that's all that mattered.

When Conner opened his eyes, they were burning red and searching the sky for the attacker. He found it, without looking away, he gently Put Tim down in Jons arms. "Jon, Go inside." Conner demanded, eyes burning red with anger.

"What?? No!"

But Jon didn't have time to complain, Conner took off immediatly and went out for blood.

~

Getting out of Unconsciousness felt like swimming in a pool that has no air. It feels like drowning while you can still breath.

Step by step, Tim regained his feels and then collapsed back into unconsciousness. But this time, he could feel the reality around him.

Smell. touch. Sight.

Smell of the old wooden house filled his senses and he could feel himself lieing on a warm bed and gentle hands were holding his own. When Ti. opened his eyes. Conner was sitting on a corner of the bed and holding his hans gently. His eyes were closed which suggested he was listening to something.

Conner was listening to Tims weak heartbeat and when it sped up dramatically, He opened his eyes with a smile.

"Well look who is back with is." Conner murmured softly. "We were worried, man. I wanted called Batman."

"Noh." came out of tims mouth. "Not Bahtman." he said breathlessly.

Conner frowned down. "We can't just leave you like this." He stated angrily. "You need a doctor."

No. A doctor would tell them about his hanahaki and the entire house of card would crumble down and Tim couldn't even think about it.

"Not Batman" he said with a batglare of his own. He tried to stand up but pain shot all over his back and he hissed in pain and almost fell back on the bed.

"If not Batman then who?" Conner asked gently. Fixing the pillows behind him and gently rubbing Tims face. Tim wanted to just melt in his touch but he stopped hismelf. Tim closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Give me my communicator." he demanded with his weak voice.

Conner just gave it to him. Tim send a small distress call and slumbed back on the bed. "Call Batman when I leave. Please." he said, not meeting Conners eyes.

"Why?" he said and withdrew his hand. "You guys are on speaking terms?"

"Not really." Tim lied and shook his head. "I just don't want him to see this specific event. Right now."Conner nodded hesitantly.

Tim detective side won over and he leaned forward as much as he could. "What was that?" he asked curiously.

"I don't know." Conner answered. "It was a robot armed with kryptonite. After you were shot. I ordered Jon to take you inside and went to take it on. Ita kryptonite canon was slow and taking it out was a piece of cake... No one was inside."

At the thought of Conner going head first into danger, Tims heart dropped. "Reckless." Tim murmured angrily and frowned at his friend. "What if it had OTHER unknown Kryptonite weapons? You could have been shot!"

"He shot you, Tim." Conner shouted back. "I couldn't just let it go away."

"RECKLESS." Tim shouted. "Stupid and careless. you could have been hurt! You could have been hurt!"

Conner wanted to open his mouth to speak up but Jon came in unannounced. He bit his lip and looked at Conner. "Someone's here." he said quietly.

Conner raised an eyebrow and stood up. He glanced back at Tim before heading down.

There was a woman with dark coat and a cowboy hat downstairs, sitting uncomfortably on the sofa and playing the edge of her sleeve. A think pare of shades covered her eyes and parts of her long curly blonde hair were visible outside of the hat. When she noticed the two boys coming down she stiffed and stood up.

She wasn't a good actor but her posture was confident.

Conner crossed his arms and glared at the woman. "Who are you?" Conner asked, blocking her path to the stairs and consequently to Tim.

The girl tilted her head a little and moved her shades to take a good look at the superboy. "Agent M." she said dramatically, waving her hand around. "Im here for Red Robin."

Jon dashed forward. "Never heard of you." He said and crossed his arms, Coping Conner.

Mary rolled her eyes. "As you should." she said confidently and sligtly puffed her chest to look bigger. "I'm a secret."

Conner doubted there was any secret left that He didn't kknow about. But he'd never seen this woman in his life. "Oh really? What does M stand for?" he asked angrily.

Agent M crossed her arms with a frown. "Medicine." she said immediatly. "Im Agent medicine."

"Madison?" Conner said and raised an eyebrow.

Agent M roled her eyes. "Medicine!" She said angrily. "Look. You think batman doesn't know about this but he knows anf he's coming. And I have to get Red Robin to the Robin nest immediatly."

Agent took a step forward and pointed at him with her index finger. "If you really are his friend you'll let me take him." she demanded.

Conner cleared the way for her to go up. Agent M smile and murmured: "thanks" before going up and quietly closing the door behind her.

Conner and Jon went over there immediately and opened the door. Conner wasn't going to leave Tim alone with a complete stranger. To their surprise, Agent M was teasing Tims injuries and Tim had an anmoyed smile on his face. Agent M looked at the two of them before saluting and pressing a button on a control in her hand. "I'll take it from here." she announced.

Tims eyes landed on Conner and he smiled bitterly and slowly waved goodbye. Conner nodded.

The controller in her hand turned out to be an instant teleporter to the Robins nest becouse in a blink of an eye, they were gone.

They were gone and that left Conner wondering about his extreme reaction to Tims injury.

=======

Mary waited until the doctors had left before he started talking. All the while, she said nothing as the doctors did their work.

Tim didn't know where she had found them. He didn't know how she had found specialized doctors who had agreed to say nothing to their guardian. Tim only heard her demand the Gotham General hospital staff for "stage 3 paranormal emergency" along with "Hanahaki secrecy policy " and then the doctors were tending to him without even asking who he was.

Mary never left the room. She never took her eyes off Tims injured back. Tim knew the guilty look on her face too well. Tim used to see it everyday whenever his parents failed to show up at school.

The doctors finished and instructed Tim on how to use a certain chemical and the injury will only leave a slight scar. The doctor also insisted on using the Hanahaki medication once a day regularly if he wants to live whatever time he has left peacefully.

The doctor left them with a nodd and told them they call leave tonight. The doctor left them alone in the silence. Marys intense stare never left his eyes and if he wasn't used to worse batglares, things would have been awkward.

"How did you find these medical personnel? Are they friends from STAR labs?" Tim asked seriously.

Mary ignored the question and took a deep breath. "It is him isn't he?" she asked and titled her chin up. "The farm boy. He's the reason you're like this."

Tim rolled his eyes. "No Mary, Kon is just my best friend." he said with a bitter smile.

Mary frowned. "Oh, Really?" she mocked. "For the record. I was your best friend for a loooong time but you left me alone with a bunch of mercenary kidnappers in our school!"

Tim sighed loudly. "This again?? How many times should I tell you I'm sorry." Tim murmured guiltily. "I had to change to Robin Gear. Or else I would have been shot dead!"

"And yet... That was not a problem with the farmboy." Mary murmured and narrowed her eyes. "Its him. Stop denying it."

Tim sighed heavily and ran a hand through his hair. "Ok, fine. Its him." Tim confessed and looked at Mary with a frown. She had a mocking smile on her face.

"Why am I surprised?" Mary murmured quietly, Eyes never leaving his friends. "What's his name? Other than superboy."

"Conner Kent or... Kon-El." Tim said with a bitter smile. "I know what you want to say. I won't confess." Tim said as a matter of fact. "He has a girlfriend and I... I can't force him to do anything and he will do something becouse he's my best friend and outcome of me confessing is just--" Tim didn't finish. He just sighed and looked away.

Mary's hazel eyes didn't leave his face. She sat on the corner of the bed and crossed her arms. "The decision is yours." Mary murmured. Tim glanced back at her.

Mary took a deep breath. "Do you remember the time when I showed you my favorite myth book and told you I have to you stab an arrow to your heart if your Hanahaki gets painfull? Its a stupid myth and all but Im starting to think you're going to do that to yourself. You don't even seem to realise the severity of your illness."

Tim nodded. "It won't come down to that, I promise." he said confidently.

Marys face morphed into disgust. "How do you promise that?" she whispered. "Look, I know you won't tell anyone anytime soon but... Please, Tim... Promsie me you'll come to me about anything thats bothering you, Ok?"

"Ok, Fine." Tim answered with a smile.

Mary pat him in the shoulder before she left the room to finalise the paperwork for Tims release. Tim starred at the door when it closed and then ran his hands through his hair.

He honestly had no idea what he had gotten himself into.

=======

Convincing the residents of Wayne manor that he was fine was different. Mary had come out of nowhere with the "Agent M" and unknowingly tripled the batfamilies paranoia. But a simple OK was Leslie Thompkins was enough to dull down the Batmans worry.

That night he had another episode of violent coughs before going to bed. As he stared at the red petals in his hand anf an aching heart beating in his chest, Tim found out the duration that the hanahaki pills last and was already working on optimizing its use.

He didn't throw the petals away. He held them in his hands and kept them near his heart as he drifted go sleep.

That night he dreamt of farms and corn. He dreamt of running free in a field of fresh flowers and with a certain farmboy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated.


	3. The end of the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of the world is an overrated concept, unless your world is summarized in one person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooooo! So I finally wrote the third chapter and decided to get myself out of anonymous wiriting! Hello everyone that I probably dont know!
> 
> Warning: please look at the WARNINGs on this work becouse its about to get real.

"The end of the world" was an overrated concept.

Tim faced "the end of the world", "the end of gotham" and "the end of humanity" on a daily basis. At this point, he was used to the adrenaline floating in his veins and the paranoia in his head.

However, neither of the previous interactions with the multiverse included another kryptonian. Much less one named "Superboy prime". Tim should have guessed the outcome.

Tim had barely made Conner to the medbay of the watchtower after his first encounter with that ruthless being. Tim could hear his own heartbeat echo in the empty watchtower as he tried to set up superman's special solar rays, in hopes of healing the boy of steel.

Tim lay him down in the gurney and tried not to lose focus. Conner's skin was ripped and bruised and broken bones were visible at some points, he was somehow still awake. Tim pressed a hand to his weakly beating heart and pressed him down. "Don't move." Tim murmured quietly.

He pushed the solar rays next to Conner and they flared to life, giving the injured kryptonian the much needed energy.

When Conner closed his eyes with relief and relaxed back on the gourney, Tim let out the breath he didn't know he was holding. He felt like the invisible weight of the world was lifted from his shoulder when Conner rigid breathing softened a little.

Conner's blue eyes moved a little to see Tims face. A weak smile appeared on his face. Tim looked away for a moment before he took a deep breath. It made it worse, Tims lungs couldn't expand much, breathing was becoming sacred and painful.

Conner's weak hands were lifted a little bit and hovered above tims wrist before gripping it weakly. Tim almost flinched away but looked at Conner.

Ge was too weak to speak at the moment, give it a few seconds, he'll be healed completely but not right now.

Tim hesitantly laced their fingers together and his mouth formed a soft smile. His hand felt warmer than usual. "It'll get you fixed up." Tim murmured softly.

Conner just huffed and his eyes darted back to the rays and closed his eyes. His touch on tims hand stayed and Tim couldn't dare let go.

The bruises and tears on Conner's skin slowly snitched themselves shut with no scars. Tim could actually see the process and he couldn't help but believe in magic for a moment.

He wanted to open his mouth and comment on it before he felt the familiar ache in the back of his throat and something warm trailed down his lip. Tim reached up with his free hand and it came out red.

Tims eyes widened and he coughed violently, not having even a small break between them. Tim drew his hand back and ran out of the room before Conner could comment on it.

Tim dashed into the bathrooms and pressed his back against the door. Smooth flower petals touched his hand. Tim closed his eyes. His lungs were almost collapsing on itself trying to get rid of the flowers to no avail.

He let his hand fall down when he felt the last of the coughs pass by. The red petals slipped from his fingers and fell to the ground. Tim couldn't bring himself to care. He gripped the sides of the sink trying to keep himself from falling and battling the dark spots in his vision.

Tim stared at his own reflection in the mirror and took a deep breath, then another and another to calm the heart that was beating rapidly in his chest. Tim could see the dust and bruises on his own face. unconsciously, he lifted his bloodied hand and touched the skin under his eyes. Dark Circles under his grey eyes made him look years older than what he actually was.

The water was opened and Tim tried to wash away the evidence of his Hanahaki once again. After all this time he was a master. The fact that he'd left Conner alone was suspicious enough already and he didn't want to worry his kryptonian friend that should be completely healed at this point.

Tim took a deep breath and opened the door to find his way back next to the gourney where Conner was supposed to be resting.

To his surprise, he wasn't. Conner was standing next to the computers and talking to someone's hologram that Tim couldn't quite see. "I'll be down there." Conner said and the communication ended.

Those four words scared Tim to his bones. He reacted before he could really see the stupidity of this act. He covered the path to the teleporters with his body and gave Conner an angry frown. "You are in no shape to get back to the field." Tim hissed.

"Tim, are you serious?" Conner asked and raised an eyebrow. His face was good as new and he could walk. Perfect for a normal human. But horrible if you want to waltz back to superboy prime to get hurt again or even--

"Yes." Tim hissed. "You're benched."

"Tim.. You can't do that..." Conner murmured as a matter of fact as he tried to cross tim to get to the teleporters. "And you can't stop me."

"As the leader of Young justice. Yes I can."

Conner just laughed it off. "I can't just sit here and let him kill everyone." he shouted. Tim tried to push him back but failed. Conner was walking towards the teleporters like nobody was stopping him.

Tim gripped Conners shirt. Years and years of Batman training allowed him to stop himself from tearing up. "You can't just go and let him kill you!" he shouted. "No! Conner stay!! You'll get killed!"

Conner should have shrugged it off and given him a sarcastic comment about being invulnerable and being the boy of steel. Conner should have been his sassy self and made fun of Tims concern about an unlikely scenario such as conners death.

Instead, Conner lightly grapped Tim by the shoulder and pulled him close into a hug. "You have to let me go. It'll be fine." he murmured. It took all of Tims self control not to melt in his embrace.

Conner was always smarter than he showed.

"No. There... There should be another way. If you go down there now he'll injure you easier than last time." Tim murmured quietly. He could feel his hand shaking hesitantly.

Conner broke the hug but kept his hands on Tims shoulder and kept Tim close in an arm's length. "You can't outsmart this one, rob." Conner said with a sad smile. "You can't do much about this."

Tim shook his head. "No we can--"

"So thank you for everything that you've done." Conner murmured and gently leaned closer until his lips were inches away from Tims ear. "And for everything that you couldn't do."

Before Tim could blink, Conner was gone. Tims reaction was slow. When he turned towards the teleporters, the teleporters were already working with bright white light and announced Conners code. Tim ran towards the light to get down with him but he was too slow.

Recognized superboy B-03.

Tims hands only reached the dust. He was left alone in the watchtower. "Get me there now!" Tim shouted angrily at the teleporters.

No repose came. He hopped off the zeta teleporter to reassess the location as fast as he could but found the computer was blocked. "No the---" he frantically pulled out his wrist computer. Conner had blocked the computer to keep him here. how could he do that?

It would take Tim less than a minute to decode the teleporters and get down there.

But he felt something grip his throat and he could no longer get air into his lungs. He coughed up and a small bloodied flower petal fell to the floor. Tim opened his eyes and struggled to breathe.

Not now, Not now, NOT NOW!

But the world wasn't revolving around his wishes.

The room around him started to spin. There was nothing to lean on so he lost his balance and fell to the floor. The coughs returned with a vengeance. His eyes started to blur, he didn't know if it was because of the tears or the coughs but he couldn't see so clearly anymore.

Dark spots appeared in his blurred vision. Tim reached out with his hands, aiming his hands at the teleporters but his strength was lost long before he could do anything.

The black spots covered his vision completely. Tims hand fell down on the ground and his eyes closed. The sound of his rigid breathing echoed in the empty watchtower.

~

Tim woke up with a gasp having no idea how much time has passed.

He spiralled up and picked up the red flower petal. From unlocking the teleporters to getting to Conners last location took approximately thirty seconds. He landed on the ruins of the outskirts of Metropolis, where the battle had taken place.

His heart was hammering in his chest. He could hear his own heartbeat in his ears but what scared him wasn't that. It was the deathly silence in the ruins. "Kon!" he shouted. His own echo was the only response he got.

_Kon... Kon... Kon..._

Tim saw the trails of battle. He followed it up until he saw what was behind a ruined building.

At first he didn't see anyone. It was Just Batman, superman, wonder woman and nightwing standing in a circle. At first Tim just heard silence and then he could hear Cassie's sobs.

His heart skipped a beat. "Conner." he murmured and ran. Tim almost tripped and fell over nothing but he kept running. He could have heard wrong. It might not be Conner!

Please don't be Conner! Please don't be Conner please don't be--

He bumped Nightwing trying to get close to the middle of the circle. "Tim wait." Nightwing murmured and grabbed his elbow, not allowing him to get closer. Tim felt slight pain where Nightwing was holding his arms but no pain could even compare to when his brain processed the image in front of him.

The person that was lying on the ground. The person Cassie was kneeling next to. The person Cassie was holding like her depended on it and it would somehow force life back into him.... Was Conner, his Kon-El.

"No." Tim shouted soundlessly. He struggled to get out of Dicks hold but His movements were sloppy and Dick couldn't let him go. Dick wrapped his arms around his brother and took him into his embrace. Tims eyes couldn't leave Conners.

Conner's face was bruised. His eyes were open and staring at nothing. The place Cassie waa hunched over was probably the wound that caused his death.

Conner death.

Death.

A sob escaped his lips and he trashed harder in Dicks arms. He wasn't going to let go and injure himself further. Dick kept murmuring sweet nothings in his ear that Tim couldn't quite hear.

All he could hear was silence and the absence of a joke, laughter and Conner's precious smile.

Gradually, his struggles ceased to exist. Tim just dropped to his knees. Eyes seeing nothing and everything at once.

=========

Conner's funeral went unexpectedly without any problems. In the early morning of Smallville, the smell of fresh grass was hovering in the air and the weather was still chilly from the winter even when the spring sun was shining.

Conner hated it here.

Tim couldn't bring himself to speak. He just stood there, alone and terrified to the deep of his heart. Unlike most people, Tims hair was soaked wet before he didn't acknowledge the weather when it was raining. His eyes and senses were on the coffin, or rather, who was inside.

Cassie made the speech, elegant and flawless as ever, about what a great person Conner Kent was, what a great friend he was. She mourned the fact that the "car accident" took him too soon from this world.

No one could explain the appearance of the Wayne family in a small funeral in smallville, so he came here alone and stood away from the crowd. He didn't even go towards Bart and Cassie. He just stood there, at the back of the church, holding Conners favorite pair of round sunglasses in his hand and gently playing with it.

He could see Clark and Lois on the front row, talking to the other people. Jon however was in Ma and Pas' strong embrace. They held their little grandson like their life depended on it.

Tim took a deep breath and looked at the sunglasses on his right hand and felt tears forming in his eyes once again. He swallowed thickly as he tried to control his breathing and get his emotions into check again.

Tim could by the shaking on his hands that he was failing. He closed his fingers around the glasses and closed his eyes. He wanted to get away, but reality always had the habit of convincing him of the facts the worst possible way. Tims heart skipped a beat at the thought of "what's next?" "will the world continue to spin even without conner? How dare it?"

Not many people could sneak up on him, Cassandra was no exception. He felt her presence the moment she stepped inside the church. Tim tried desperately to hide his despertar red eyes from her view.

Cassandra's black suit hugged her figure. She looked around looking for her brother and no one else. She made her way and stood right next to him without saying a word.

Tim slowly put the shades in his pocket and looked forward, not meeting Cassandra's eyes. The last thing he needed was the safe feeling of being next to a family member to trigger another hoard of emotions that he couldn't control.

Tim felt the lump in his throat when Conners picture was lifted from the coffin and The wooden coffin was slowly being taken away to the cemetery. He bit his lower lip trying to keep himself from crying and failed. Tim tried desperately to wipe away the tears with the back of his hand and not to meet Cassandra's eyes.

Cassandra gently held his hand in her own, slightly assuring him with her presence. Tim glanced at her eyes, eyes that whispers "it will be alright" so clearly it didn't need to be said out loud. But Tim knew it was just hopeful thinking. Cassandra slowly took him in an embrace. Tim hesitantly wrapped his arms around her sister and buried his head in her shoulder.

When a sob escaped his lips, all tight control was taken from him and he couldn't stop the flood of tears from coming. The memories wouldn't stop marching in front of him. Tim saw Conners smile, laughter and death right in front of him all at once.

Cassandra held his hand tighter.

==========

Mary sighed loudly as he closed the thick book with a frown. Three months of reading this guide book and she'd understood nothing of what must be done. She took another look at the cover and traced her hands around the words:"To do's and not to do's: Hanahaki edition". It was useful most of the time when it was talking about the help from friends and family, she'd even taken a few notes but the rest was useless. She carelessly threw it across the sofa and stared at her notes.

_"A victim of Hanahaki might suffer from depression in early stages. Getting professional help is always advised."_

_"Although it's no cure, victims who had the support of family and close friends tended to live up to years with Hanahaki whilst others died within weeks."_

_"Special Hanahaki pills might reduce the speed of the flowers by half if taken regularly."_

_"Regular interaction with the loved one has had no proven benefit for the Hanahaki victim."_

_"The death of the loved one might end up causing the death of the Hanahaki victim or if the surgery is taken, it might result in permanent or partial amnesia."_

_"In some parts of the world, getting the flower removal surgery is forbidden after the victim has coughed up full flower petals. because it takes the ability to ever love, platonically or romantically, from that person. Most of the Hanahaki victims who get the surgery at this stage either become great scientists or social sadists and a huge danger to society_."

Mary closed her notebook with a loud sound and shook his head. "As if!" she murmured and gently put her notebook aside to turn in the TV and try to force herself to enjoy a nice cup of cereal and watch the news.

"In other news. The famous Superboy was pronounced dead. The famed teen superhero was known for its positive attitude and dark looks. Superboy was killed by a multiversal being called Superboy prime at approximately 3--"

Mary spat out what she was eating. Her mouth dropped and she listened to the news anchor recite the rest of her speech.

"At 3 pm three days ago. The people of Metropolis have already petitioned to create a statue for this teen hero next to the statue of superman. Latest reports shows---"

Mary grabbed the remote and turned it off. She hopped off the couch and picked up her phone. She had Tim on speed dial so she called him immediately. She didn't know what she had to say, but she knew Tim wasn't alright. Tim tells her literally everything.

Tim had most likely kept his crippling emotions to himself for three days. Mary hated to even think of it. She was the only person who knew of tims Hanahaki, or Tims love for a dead man now.

"Hello this is Tim Wayne. Im in a meeting right now so please leave a message."

Mary sighed loudly as he called again.

"Hello this is Tim Wayne. Im in a meeting right now so please leave a message."

Mary rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Tim. It's me Mary. I... I heard the news, Tim. I'm so sorry. Just... Just call me back, ok." she murmured softly, trying to sound as gentle as she could.

Even though she knew Tim wasn't really in a meeting, she grabbed her coat and rushed to Wayne Enterprises. She used her card to get inside without grabbing unwanted attention until she reached tims office.

Tims Secretary was busy with her own paper works so she went straight to the point. "I want to talk to Tim Wayne." she stated.

The Secretary looked at her employed scientist ID and rolled her eyes. "Im sorry, Mr Wayne isn't available at the moment." The Secretary answered.

Mary narrowed her eyes, it took all of her strength not to slam her hands on the table and demand to see Tim. "Where is he, Ms?" she asked.

"I told you he's not available at the moment." the Secretary hissed.

Mary growled and stepped back from the table. stopping herself from doing something she'll regret. She walked away until she reached the elevator.

In the elevator, she put her back against the wall and sighed loudly. He couldn't do much now, not without risking her job.

She pulled her loose curly blonde hair back and called Tim again. She waited until it went back on voicemail.

"Hello this is Tim Wayne. Im in a meeting right now so please leave a message."

Mary closed his eyes and instead, called the manor. He could be in the manor even if it's uncharacteristic for him.

"Wayne manor, how may I help you." Alfred's tired voice came from the other side.

Mary swallowed thickly and put on her happiest voice ever known. "Hi!... I uhm... Wanted to talk to Tim."

"I'm afraid I must ask what do you need with master Timothy?"

"Timothy?" Mary murmured. "I just wanted to make sure he's all right."

"Im sorry he's at WE. Im afraid." Alfred answered politely. "I'll make sure to tell him you asked for him when he returns."

"Thanks mr pennyworth. Good day." she murmured and ended the call. She stared at the phone number in her hand for a moment. "Tim." she whispered. "Where are you?"

=========

_4 new messages._

_"It's Tam fox. Tim you better not have forgotten about the meeting today."_

_"Drake, where are you? Your communication is offline. Father and Grayson are searching the world for you."_

_"Tim. It's me Mary. I... I heard the news, Tim. I'm so sorry. Just... Just call me back, ok."_

_"It's your buddy, Bart. Dude what did you do? Batman just called us and asked us to look for you? You alright?"_

Tim sighed loudly and turned off his voicemail. He leaned back against the only chair in his robin's nest and stared at the results painted on red Background.

Attempt 99: failed.

All around him was green vials of failed- failed- failed experiments.

Tim rested his head on his hands and shook his head. This was his last hope, his last chance and it had failed.

He didn't expect a sound of rustling to come out of the doorway, he spiraled into action and picked up his bo staff, ready to fight off the attacker. The room was dark and the only source of light was the computer behind him.

Tim was surprised to see a mop of blonde hair make it to his hideout and stand in front of him. Cassie's hair was really getting long.

Tim dropped his offending posture and stood up, looking at Cassie directly in the eyes.

Cassie sighed loudly. "Batman called me and wanted me to go after you." Cassie murmured and turned on the light. The lights stinged Tims eyes for a moment. It took awhile for him to adjust.

Tim turned his back to her and turned off the computer, putting the data away from her view. "How did you find me?" Tim asked seriously.

"You left Kons line open. Cyborg tracked it for us." Cassie explained.

Stupid. Tim thought to himself. He never thought of closing Kons' comlink. He closed his eyes and opened them with a frown. "Tell Batman I'm fine." he said and turned around, going for his various test tubes on the other side.

"You clearly are not." Cassie murmured quietly. She gently took a step forward and put a hand on his shoulder. Tim almost winced away. Tim prayed his Hanahaki would stay away when Cassie was here. He absolutely can't afford to have an episode infront of her caring eyes. Tim stopped fidgeting with the vials and looked back at Cassie. Her smile was somehow soothing that deeply buried pain away. "Tim what are you doing in this dark lab." she asked seriously.

Tim brushed her hand off. "Just tying some loose ends." He stated. "Thanks for dropping by Cassie but I really appreciate it if you leave me alone."

Cassie was stunned for a moment before she drew her hand back and nodded. Tim was very grateful she didn't think of asking more questions. Cassie hovered above the ground and wanted to slowly leave from where she came when her eyes landed on the equipment with the Cadmus sign AND Superman's S shield on it. She stopped immediately and looked at Tim with horror. "Tim what is The pod that cloned Conner doing here?" she asked, voice panicked but calculating.

Tim froze, he almost dropped the green vial to the ground. "I told you I'm tying some loose ends here." he insisted. He turned to get back to the computer and pretend nothing had happened when he felt something close around his right wrist. Tim looked at it to see a golden rope, shining with golden aura.

She wouldn't--

"Cassie whats"

Cassie just pulled the rope and tightened further around his wrist. Tim didn't have time to untie it. "Are you cloning conner?" Cassie asked sternly. Tim had no choice but to answer. The answer was short and simple.

"Yes."

Reality seemed to crash all around him when he said that. Cassie's eyes narrowed but she let go of the lasso around his wrist. Tim pulled his hand back and rubbed it gently. Tim couldn't bring himself to look at Cassie's grief staken face.

"How dare you!" she said loudly. Cassie's thread of patience was gone. "That won't be conner." Cassie shouted.

Tim gripped his hair and pulled back, he had been debating with himself over that for so long, he didn't remember his own excuses anymore. "IT WILL BE SOMETHING!" he shouted back.

They could continue to shout at each other while the lab equipment around them did their job. But silence settled between the two friends and the only voice that echoed in that dark room was the sound boiling and machines.

Tim let go of his hair and took a deep breath, apologies already coming out of his mouth. "Im sorry, I... I shouldn't shout at you... I'm sure... I'm sure you're grieving your boyfriend more than me." he murmured softly. He was too exhausted to stay standing. Unconsciously he leaned against the wall and slid down until he was on the ground.

Cassie shook her head and wiped a rogue tear with the back of her hand before joining tim on the ground. "He wasn't my boyfriend when he died." she admitted quietly. Very quietly. If Tim hadn't been sitting right next to her he might have missed it. Tims eyes widened and he covered his mouth with his hand out of shock.

What?

"We... We were taking a break from each other when he died. We.. We broke up." Cassie said and ran a hand through her loose blonde locks.

Tims eyes widened. Was that why---

Cassie looked at him with fierce expressions. "It doesn't matter." she said as a matter of fact. "I know you cared for him, Maybe even more than I did, but this isn't something you want to go down with, Tim."

Tim gripped the sides of his sleeve tightly and stood up. He faced his computer and glanced back at Cassie for a moment. "Leave me alone, Cassie, I have a lot to do." Tim demanded quietly and turned around, Turning his back to her completely.

Cassie stood up. He opened her mouth to shout at Tim for a moment before she closed it and nodded angrily. She was out of the hideout in a moment and the only announcement was the wind that followed her. Tim regretted making his hideout so perfect. He could hear Cassie talk while standing outside of the building.

"Dick." she murmured, holding the phone tightly to her ear. Tim tried to block out the sounds. Tim looked at the last experiment thoughtfully, Cassie's words still ringing slightly in his mind.

_It won't be him_

Tim swallowed thickly. He opened the plastic cover of the giant red button on the main computer. His finger hovered above it for a moment. Tim bit his lower lip, closed his eyes and pressed down.

He regretted it immediately but it was too late, his samples of DNA were all destroyed. There was no going back to cloning again.

Tim took a deep breath and stormed out, never to return to this cursed lab, the rattling of his cape echoed in the background.

=========

The green pit was bubbling and boiling. The sound of it echoed in the dark cave in the middle of the Himalayas, hidden beneath thick layers of snow, behind abandoned temples.

It wasn't hard for Tim to find it. Ra's al ghul did a horrible job of hiding his lazarus pits from Batman's files. All Tim had to do was to hack a few files in the batcave and steal the batjet. The only downside of it was that probably someone knew he was gone by now

So he had to hurry.

Tim took out the long vial from his utility belt and walked closer to the green pit. It felt like boiling water from afar, deadly, but Tim still forced himself to close down the vial until the lid barely touched the boiling green liquid.

Why was this Lazurus pit abandoned? Was it broken? Would it not work? Tim couldn't bear the thought so he approached the lazarus pit. He could do that, he could do that for Conner. Even if Conner will only ever see him as a friend. Even if he'll never be more than Cassie.

Tim took a deep breath and lowered the viled to the poisonous green waters until the waters slowly filled the vial.

Tim entirely froze when he heard heavy and familiar footsteps into the cave. He could hear Nightwing swing his escrima sticks, expecting to battle the shadows to get to the pit. Tim knew they were alone.

Nightwing slowly lowered his escrima sticks. Looking at his brother, who was hunched over one of the most deadliest liquids. "Tim... Dont do that." Dick pleaded gently and put his sticks back on his back. "You know it won't just revive Conner."

Tim gritted his teeth and closed his eyes. The hand holding the green vial slowly shook. Tim almost dropped it but he hurried back and caught it before the vial fell into the pit. Tim sighed in relief that he didn't lose the vial.

"Tim lets get back home." Nightwings voice was closer. Tim dreads to think how close his brother was and how easily he could snatch the vial out of tims hands, terminating his plan before it even started. "That won't bring back his soul." Nightwing murmured gently. Tim turned his head slightly to see nightwing standing right behind him, close but still.

Tim could read his brother's body language by now. "He'll be alive!!" Tim shouted desperately. Standing up and holding the filled vial to his face. A wicked smile appeared on Tims face even though he was at war with himself.

"Yeah well. Let's ask where Ras and Talia's souls have been these days?" Dick shouted. The words echoed in the empty cave. Tim towards them completely.

"Why can every villian return with no fuss." he shouted, pointing at himself. "But I have to keep living while my loved ones die!!"

Nightwings eyes softened. He slowly reached up for his own mask and removed it from his face so Tim could see his Blue eyes clearly. "Those are excuses and you know it." Nightwing stated carefully.

Tim bit his lip and looked back at the pit, holding the green vial like his life depended on it. Tim couldn't bear to look at his brother's eyes because he knew he was right the same way Cassie was right.

"I know you're stronger than that." Dick murmured softly. "Tim... We... All of us are here to get you through this."

Tims breath started to shake violently as he recognised the signs of the start of a Hanahaki episode. Tim gasped loudly and bit his lips. He hoped it wouldn't get to that, not here... Not now.

But to his surprise, nothing happened. The strange feeling of suffocation was the end of it. No coughing came after.

"Tim..."

Dicks voice brought him to the present. The green vial he was holding slowly started to get warm... Too warm. Tim took a deep breath. Dick was right. Cassie was right.

Kon was gone... And none of this was going to bring him back. That was a fact.

And if Tims mind has been good at one thing his entire life was acting on facts.

Tim took a deep breath and walked to the edge. He held the vial in front of him and closed his eyes. Slowly, he turned it upside down and let it fall into the lazarus pit, dissolving into nothing.

Tim opened his eyes with a small gasp. The realisation of what he had done hit him like a brick wall. He was tired of all this fighting, fighting with himself, with facts, with reality.

He wanted a break. He didn't even have the strength to keep standing. Unconsciously, Tim dropped to his knees. His eyes fixed on the boiling green waters. Dick kneeled next to him and embraced him in a one armed hug. Murmuring things Tim couldn't quite hear. Tears started to form in the back of his eyes.

Tim leaned to Dicks figure and closed his eyes, living in his embrace and thriving in that sense of security. "I knew you'd make the right decision." Dick murmured softly.

Tim closed his eyes. A tear escaped his eyes and trailed all the way down his face.

=========

Another week passed in blissful peace.

Tim never let go of his duties as Tim Wayne. Wayne Enterprises was thriving as ever. It took a large portion of his time and Tim filled the other with batclan related business.

A week later, when he found himself looking at the mirror after an episode of violent coughs, he realised something. Tim slowly started to realise the number of the flowers he was coughing up was decreasing. He tried to pay it no mind.

The next time he coughed up flower petals was almost two weeks after that. Tim couldn't ignore the patterns anymore.

Tim found his way to the bathroom after politely excusing himself from the family dinner. He opened his palm and all that was gathered in his hand was three dry flower petals. His heart almost jumped.

He couldn't ignore the patterns anymore, Tims Hanahaki was decreasing.

At first, Tim barked out a laugh before he hurriedly covered his mouth. Someone could hear him. Someone could find him out.

And Tims laugh was slowly diverting into a sickly version of the joker's laugh. His body shook until he could catch his breath once again. He leaned on the cabinet and stared at his own reflection in the mirror.

He looked exactly the same as he did yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that.

His body however, seemed to slowly forget about why he had Hanahaki in the first place. It made him sick to his stomach that somehow his first response was laughing at that twist of fate.

He crushed the dry flower petals in his hands and lay his head low. Why was it like that? Why was he forgetting? "Why? Why? WHY!" he shouted and threw the three petals in the air. His eyes landed on his reflection. Tim could hear his own heavy breathing echo. He held his head in his hands while the water ran, the sound of it cooling his burning nerves down.

The flowers had decreased because Conner was dead. He was dead and there was no love anymore. With no love came no hanahaki. Tim laughed nervously as tears started running down his face. He tried to wipe it away but he couldn't stop it. There was a lump in his throat that stopped him from breathing in or out.

But if he wasted another moment in the bathroom, someone would get suspicious and he lived with a cauldron of paranoid bats.

He washed every evidence from his face, a virtue he had mastered in the past year, and went back to dinner like nothing had happened. He sat through Damian rambling about how boring school was and nodded at whatever Cassandra was saying. Bruce, like always, kept his silence and enjoyed being with his daughter and two sons.

Tim gave himself a moment of relief when the night ended and everyone went to their rooms. He thanked heavens Damian had grown out of his habit of sneaking into tims room unannounced, or else he'd have so much trouble.

Tim sat down next to the window and his headphones poured loud music into his ears. Tim watched the moon and counted as many stars as he could.

Sleep wasn't going to come to him that night, he knew that. So he let his music roam free and blast music into his ears all night.

The sun had risen completely when he picked up his phone and made a call. Mary was still sleepy on the other side, obviously still in bed. Quietly, without anyone hearing him or noticing he's awake, he explained everything like it was reciting the evidence of a murder scene. He told her the flowers were decreasing.

Mary didn't get the memo.

She absolutely _beamed_ with happiness.

=========

Twenty-four hours later, Mary had gotten Tim a doctors appointment right after his last WE meeting. Mary picked him right up and didn't even answer to Tamara Fox. Tim had to admit such overrated confidence will get her killed one day. She was lucky Tim didn't want to be alone.

Doctor Roquelles clinic was very clean. Located in one of the best parts of town on top of a ten story building. Tim wondered how many Hanahaki victims were registered yearly but from the looks of it... They were A Lot.

All over her superb blue clinic, there were colorful Inspirational posters and quotes about how life is great. Tim was tired of reading them all day, every day, since the exact same quotes were plastered all over WE.

The chairs were in small groups and each group was located far away from the other, precisely to give the patience the much needed space.

Tim and Mary sat down together and Mary busied herself with a magazine immediately. Tim was left to stare at the wall and fidget nervously with his fingers.

After a few minutes, Mary gently held his hand with her own, gently stopping him from chewing his nails out. "It's okay." Mary murmured quietly. "We'll just see what the doctor has to say." Mary returned her focus back to her magazine. "I've never seen you this nervous." she murmured quietly.

"Me neither." Tim admitted to himself, slowly leaning back against the chair. "Me neither."

"Jackson Drake." the nurse announced.

Tim looked around but nobody seemed to be this person. No one gave a reaction and Tim cursed himself for not guessing it sooner. He elbowed Mary. "Ouch." she muttered, rubbing her hand. "What is it?"

"Jackson Drake?" the nurse repeated again, looking around the room for any reaction.

Mary stood up suddenly, toppling the table in front of her and almost throwing it upside down. "Yes... Yes Jackson Drake." she said and waved. She nonchalantly pointed at the boy sitting next to her. "Lets go, Jackson." she murmured and pushed Tim infront of him. Tim wanted to sigh loudly.

The nurse opened the door and looked back her board. "The doctor will be with you shortly." she announced and closed the door behind her. The room was simple. A table and three chairs, the walls decorated with all sorts of dried flowers and various journals from all over the world.

There were two identical chairs in front of the doctors table. Mary sat down on one of them like it belonged to her. Tim decided to wander around the room. He had to admit, the doctor was an accomplished specialist. "Jackson, really?" Tim nagged as he carefully inspected the various journals on the wall.

"What did you expect me to say? Tim Wayne?" she said with a chuckle, turning around to see how time was doing. "The guy is one of my fathers friends, but his staff can't be trusted."

They didn't have to wait long for the Doctor to come. Dr Glassman was a middle aged man with a goatee beard and greyed hair. He came inside the room with a smile and one of the most cheerful helloes Tim had ever received. He was reading Tims profile at Gotham General, Tim knew someone like him would like to know absolutely everything about their patient.

Dr Glassman started chatting with Mary before he sat down, he apologized for not attending Mary's parents funeral and Mary just gave him a sad smile.

Tim remembered to say "Hi." when Mary elbowed him in the shoulder. Dr Glassman smiled and sat behind his desk. He picked up his pen and started writing. "Well, Son. When did your Hanahaki start? I hear it's your first time."

Tim gulped. "First?" he murmured. Mary suppressed a laugh.

"You won't believe what I've been dealing with in the past thirty years." Dr glassman murmured with a smile. "So tell me, when did it start?"

"Last year." Tim murmured as he pressed his mouth to a thin line. "It started 14 months ago."

Dr Glassman, with a doctor's illegible handwriting, took notes. "Please describe the last time you had an episode." he asked.

Tim blinked a few times. "The flowers were dry and dead most likely… "

The Doctor hummed. He slowly raised his head and looked at Mary with an apologetic smile. "Mary, Dear, I should ask you to leave." Dr Glassman murmured. Mary bit her lip but nodded anyway. She picked up her bag and went out of the room as slow as humanly possible, taking too much precious time. Tim crossed his arms when the sound of the doors reached his ears.

Tim gulped slightly and took in a breath. "Is there a problem doctor?" he asked cautiously. The doctor shook his head and examined his papers again. "It's better than the alternative." he admitted quietly. Tim leaned closer to hear him better.

Dr glassman fixed his glasses and looked at Tims eyes again, questioning everything and anything. "I have to ask a question. Is your... Loved one... Currently alive?" the doctor asked with an apologetic tone.

Tim leaned back and bit his lower lip. This wasn't something he could hide. Even if he tried to, his eyes would exploit all his secrets sooner or later. He looked at the doctors face and simply said: "No."

"How long has he been gone."

"2 months. 4 days." Tim murmured and looked at the ticking clock. "5 hours. 21 minutes. 38 seconds... 39 seconds... 40 seconds..."

The doctor blinked in surprise a few times before writing down his notes. "And how was your illness before that?" he asked.

"I was close to throwing up a full flower about 10 petals at the time or so." he admitted and awkwardly touched the back of his neck. "But the flowers were always so bloody lively."

The Doctor nodded knowingly and closed his notes, time for diagnosis then. Tim took a deep breath and waited for the doctor's words to come out, taking him out of this stuper.

The words weren't what he expected it to be.

"Im... Sorry to inform you but your Hanahaki is not decreasing, it's merely taking a different route." The doctor explained, sliding down a few brochures to Tims hand. "Your flowers have dried out... Based on your current circumstance I believe you'll cough up flowers only one or two more times... But they will be extremely more painful that what you're used to... In the end, the roots still remains in your respiratory system and will kill you just as much if not removed."

Tims jaw almost dropped. "I thought... I thought it was gone... That Id--"

"That your body has forgotten about them? No my boy. The soul and body don't forget." The doctor murmured gently. "That's the painful truth. You can't stop loving them even if they are no longer with you."

~

Tim walked out of the room with a smile on his face. To everyone else in the room the smile was real but Tim knee Mary could see through it. She closed her magazine and cautiously approached him. "Tim... are you ok?" Mary murmured. Trying to establish eye contact.

Tim shook his head. "I... I don't know." Tim admitted quietly, turning away from Mary's burning gaze.

The Tim know-it-all Drake-Wayne was unsure about something? Mary bit her lip. "What do you not know?" she asked quietly.

Tim raised his head, slowly he looked at Mary's eyes again before storming out of the clinic. The doors closed behind him with a "whoosh" sound.

"Tim, Wait!" Mary almost shouted. He picked up her bag and ran as fast as she could after her friend. Gothams general hospital was crowded, people from all sizes and shapes appeared in front of her but none of them were Tim. "Tim?" she murmured as she tried to find her way between the moving crowd.

Mary reached the main entrance of the hospital. She turned around and looked all over the place. She couldn't see tims face in the crowd inside or outside the hospital. He was gone. "I hate that stupid ninja move." She murmured and massaged the bridge of her nose.

All around her, people moved around the hospital, going after their own pain. Tims face was gone. Lost in the sea of people traveling around Gotham.

=========

_"Mr Drake, I suggest you forgo the flower removal surgery as soon as possible."_

_Tims figure tightened. "I... I don't want to lose my basic love for others." he said and closed his eyes. "There's too much I can really lose."_

_"You won't, when the flowers have dried completely, the surgery won't take your ability to love from you."_

_"Really?" Tim murmured, having a hard time believing the words._

_"Yes, the only outcome of the surgery at this point is life and severe amnesia."_

_"Amnesia?"_

_"Yes. You will most likely forget about your loved one completely. most patients often forget about other things too like another close friend or a distinct place."_

_Tim pressed his mouth to a thin line and stared at the doctor. Dr Glassman smiled knowingly as he wrote Tims prescription and handed him the letter. "They would have wanted you to choose life." he said as a matter of fact._

_Tim stayed silent._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a kudos or let me know what you think in the comments! Even if you just want to shout at me XD 💜


	4. Consequence of actions.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A problem never gets solved by continuously ignoring it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Weeeeeeell, After this, only one (or maybe, maybe two) more chapters remain... I wonder what will happen ?
> 
> Muahahah (evil laughter)

Tim had a strange feeling that night. During the last week, his overall strength had decreased dramatically and he knew it. He didn't show it but he knew it.

When the sun set down and Tim suited up in his Red Robin gear, he knew it was his last time. He could barely bring himself to punch someone anymore.

He planned on just standing and watching Gotham that night, just to enjoy the sensation of using his grappling gun and standing on the high ground one more time.

Wayne tower was magnificent. Tim was certain Bruce had made this tower just to brood on top of it as batman. The view was amazing and somehow reminded everyone why they were living the vigilante life.

They were doing it for gotham. So that she would be a beautiful city once again.

His brooding was interpreted by an emergency call from oracle. "Calling Red Robin. There is a robbery nearby" Oracle said in his ear. "Three streets to your left."

Tim knew he didn't have the strength to fight robberies at this point but he pressed the communicator in his ears and said:"on my way."

He threw his grappling gun and landed on the nearby roof. He started running and jumping from rooftop to rooftop, using the parkour he learned from Dick to the fullest, although he could feel his attention slipping away.

He heard the sound of the robbers breaking the glass of a nearby jewelry store. He picked up his pace and ended up on the opposite roof. He could clearly see them toying with the gold and quickly filling their bags with diamond and emerald jewelry. He narrowed his eyes and filled his grappling hook and aimed for the other building.

He stood up, he was ready to jump and suddenly nausea took over. He gripped the grappling gun tightly and tried to regain his balance but failed.

In the meantime, The robbers saw him and almost successfully evacuated and ran off. Tim jumped to run after them. But instead of following them, Tims weak fingers lost their grip on the grappling gun and he fell all the way down.

He was too out of it to even think of a contingency, it was all because of the lack of oxygen in his blood, that was a direct result of his Hanahaki.

He was lucky he fell in the dumpster.

Tim heard the robbers run away and he knew in his current state, he'll never catch up on them.

And to make things worse, Batman and Robin appeared when The Robbers escaped. Damian saw Tim in the dumpster and started laughing loudly.

"What? Did you finally find where you belong?" Damian asked mockingly and earned a scowl from batman.

Tim stood up and walked out of the dumpster and readied his grappling gun. "Get away from me, Damian." Tim said angrily and threw his grappling gun to just fly away.

He wanted to fly away from Damian and from batman. He didn't realise there was a black shadow following him.

It took all of his power to land on the nearest roof. Tim ignored the exhaustion in his body and continued on. He wanted to find his way back to wayne tower for one last watch before he went back to the manor and said goodbye to this part of his life forever.

He didn't run, he walked. Tim was too afraid to fall down again, he couldn't take another fall like that and expect to survive.

Little by little black edges appeared in his vision. Tim gripped the side of his head but didn't stop walking. Slowly he felt his own body was betraying him as he failed to take the next step correctly. He lost his balance and fell down, spraining his ankle.

However, the pain in his ankle was the least of his worries as he felt the familiar grip on his throat and started coughing. He sat up and tried to cover his mouth and nose with his hands.

He could feel it, This time the petals were heavier and the blood was more. He could feel the dark red liquid spill from between his fingers. The flower petals were still blocking his airway and making it hard to breathe.

Suddenly he saw someone land next to him from the corner of his eyes. The figure ran towards him and helped him sit up with gentle hands. Once they were close enough, Tim saw the person was Cassandra in her Black Bat gear.

Tim looked away and held the petals in. He didn't want her to know, not now and not like this at least. But he couldn't stop it. His hand felt numb and so did the rest of his body. His hand fell down and he started to cough up the blood and red flowers all over the rooftop.

"Brother mine." Cassandra murmured softly while rubbing gentle circles along his back. "Hurt."

Tim didn't stop coughing. His entire being shook with violent coughs. Why was this taking so long? His previous episodes were much shorter.

That gave him a little bit of hope, maybe Cassandra didn't know about Hanahaki? Maybe he could come up with a convincing lie--

But he couldn't.

The dried flower petals fell from his mouth, soaked in dark blood. Time seemed to slow down as he watched the flower fall. Cassandra's eyes widened with shock. Tim tried to catch it or hide it and stop his sister from finding out his secret but it was too late. Cassandra's eyes saw the red carnations.

The dead red flower contrasted sharply against the white roof and grabbed all the attention from the two siblings. Tim felt Cassandra's hold on him tighten and she held him closer.

"Alas for my poor heart," Cassandra recited, saying what the flower meant. It felt like an arrow to his heart and he could only laugh in response. Cassandra's brown eyes were filled with worry as he looked directly into Tims grey ones. "my heart aches" she finished.

Tim quickly stretched his hand to hide the petals under his palm but cassandra beat him to it. She held the flower up in a silent question while never letting him go or letting him fall with her other hand.

It was too late to come up with a lie, Cassandra's body language screamed she knew everything already.

"Don't tell them, please." Tim pleaded, hanging on to his sister for support. "Please" his eyes were burning, he didn't want anyone to figure it all out, not this way, and not Cassandra. She was hurt enough already.

Cassandra was in shock. She stared at Tims aching face. Tim was slowly losing his grip on reality and pain was written all over his body for Cassandra to read. Tims vision was slowly fading away and his grip on Cassandra's hand was softening.

Cassandra's eyes shone in the darkness. Tears ready to spill down her face. Tim couldn't bear to look at her from the guilt it caused him.

His vision slowly narrowed to Cassandra's wet eyes. Before Tim faded away, he pleaded one more time. "Please don't-- don't tell them." he pleaded again.

Cassandra took Tim's face in her hands, softly holding his face. "Brother mine." she murmured again. this time, her voice was broken and moments away from breaking into tears. "Hurt..." she murmured softly.

That was a no then.

A tear escaped from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

Tim shut his eyes and tried to look away in shame. He had done that, he had made her cry. What sort of twisted horrible Older brother was he? He didn't deserve her love and compassion.

It didn't take long for the merciful hands of consciousness to take him away. The last thing he heard was Cassandra asking help from Oracle.

========

Tim Drake-Wayne was taken straight to Gothams general hospital and the news of his Hanahaki reached the media in a few hours.

Cass alerted the entire family and told them what he knew. Bruce and Dick were shocked beyond explanation. Neither of them could think of anyone who Tim has fallen in love with.

Damian just sat back and watched the others talk. He was never good at dealing with emotions and when Cass offered to take him home. He refused and said he'll stay as long as Dick and Bruce stayed.

Tim, however, was worse than any of the doctors predicted.

Tim slipped in and out of consciousness regularly. He saw snapchats of the room he was hospitalized in and his tired mind couldn't come up with an explanation.

"I can't believe this, Timmy." Bruce said and gently squeezed his hand.

Tim didn't know if that was a dream or a memory.

After 24 hours he woke up and stayed awake for longer periods. Bruce was the only one who was allowed entrance into the room. Tim pretended to be sleeping most of the time to avoid unnecessary questions.

And Bruce didn't talk or question him much, to his surprise.

That morning, when Bruce left, Tim opened his eyes and stopped pretending to be asleep. He took a deep breath and started coming up with a reasonable story.

His lungs were hurting more, to the point breathing was painful. It shook his entire body just to take a deep breath. This wasn't good, not at all.

He was lost in thought but when he heard the sound of the door opening he closed his eyes again and pretended to be unconscious.

The sounds of footsteps were lighter than Bruce's but heavier and smaller than Dick or Cassandras. It was Damian. Tim wondered how this kid managed to sneak inside his room.

Tim pretended to be asleep when the doors opened and Damian stepped inside. He lingered against the door for a few seconds before he came near the bed. Tim didn't flinch or show that he was awake.

Damian stared at his face, trying to process the reality he was in. However, he didn't touch him or his bed. He stayed back a few feet and was only there to watch.

Tim considered breaking his act and asking him something when Damian started speaking.

"I never wished for your death." Damian said to the seemingly unconscious boy. "Do you hear me? I never wished for your death. Wake up Drake, you're making Grayson cry and that's not acceptable."

Damian left as soon as he came, never waiting for an answer.

Tims eyes opened suddenly and he took a deep breath. He'd completely forgotten about Dick. The most emotional person in their family wasn't Cass, it was Dick.

Tim grabbed his hair and slowly pulled it out. "Oh man!" he murmured softly. He had no idea how he should be dealing with his grieving family now. He didn't want to. He didn't want to be the source of their pain and yet--

Say Devil, devil comes.

But this wasn't a devil. It was sort of an angel.

The doors opened and The person behind it was none other than Dick Grayson. He was holding a flower bouquet, most likely for Tim and heading right for his bed when he suddenly stopped.

Tims eyes widened, ok, maybe dealing with Dick right away wasn't the best course of action.

Dicks face beamed with a smile. "Tim, you're awake!" Dick said with a smile. "Hold on! I'll call--"

Tim raised both of his arms immediately. "No!" he said loudly. The sudden movement hurt his side and Tim hissed in pain.

What he'd give for his Hanahaki to be over.

Dick removed his hands from the door handle and sighed loudly.

He came closer to him and put the flowers on a nearly table with a soft smile. "Ok, we won't call anyone" he whispered quietly. "Even if Cass and Bruce have been waiting two days for you to wake up."

Tim frowned and he huffed, his side was still hurting. He tried to lie down again to dull the pain but it wouldn't stop hurting.

Dick stood next to the bed and looked down at him. Tim sighed loudly and closed his eyes. "I can't talk to any of them right now." he said as a matter of fact.

Dick said nothing. He reached his hands for Tims uneven black hair and gently pushed them out of his face. The gentle motion was far more welcome than he expected it to be. He continued to do it.

Seconds passed and the tension died down. A hundred yard stare was fixed at Tims face and it hurt Dicks heart to see his little brother so exhausted. "Who hurt my little brother?" Dick said as he slowly stroked Tim's uneven hair.

Tim swallowed down his anxiety and leaned into the touch. "No one." he whispered very quietly, he doubted Dick could even hear him. "I hurt myself."

Tims eyes felt too heavy for him to keep them open. Dick slowly lowered his mask so that Tim could see his nervous smile. "You should tell them." Dick said out of nowhere. "You should confess."

Tim wanted to laugh at the irony, But now... Now he just couldn't.

========÷

The moment he felt good enough to stand on his feet, Tim fled the hospital.

Bruce knew he couldn't keep his wayward bird in that hospital room forever. When Bruce opened the door and nobody was in it, he called out the doctors and almost ordered the hospital staff to search every inch of it for a trail of his boy.

Tim... Tim... The young boy with narrow eyes that saw so much in the world. The only person to ever uncover Batman's identity on their own. That bright lonely kid who refused to be a victim of his trauma as a child.

Bruce had a hard time admitting it to himself that he didn't see it coming. Tims fatigues didn't go unnoticed. Bruce saw the dark circles under his eyes. He heard his sleepy voice, he could feel the hesitancy behind his every move but somehow he brushed them off as another side effect of their night job.

Hanahaki... Hanahaki was a completely different story. The only person who Bruce ever saw Tim get romantically close to was Stephanie! Who managed to win his son's heart? he wondered.

As he stood cross armed in the doorframe of Tims room, he thought about the possible people, boy and girl, and found no logical option.

He heard footsteps coming. He turned around to see Dick running down the hallway in his full police outfit. "Bruce!" he shouted. "Where is he?" he asked, surprised.

Dick went inside and looked at the completely clean and empty room. "Not here." Bruce answered and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"He can't just disappear! Is there anywhere you haven't looked?" Dick asked.

Tim was good at hiding away from everyone. The fact that it took batman 18 months to find his robin's nest was a clear example. Bruce looked out of the window.

Where can he be?

"He is in no condition to be on his own." Dick almost shouted. "Do you think he..."

"No." Bruce cut him off, shrugging the tension off his body. "We must start looking for him. But I don't think he's well enough to actually get in custome."

Dick took a deep breath and nodded. He touched the back of his neck and sighed. "How did we never notice." Dick murmured regretfully. "I didn't even know he'd fallen for someone."

Bruce didn't answer. Without saying a word, he walked away, leaving his eldest in the hospital room. This search should start in the batcave.

=========

Bruce should have thought about this sooner. Wayne tower, 14th floor, apartment number 147. Mary smith was Tims childhood friend and the fact that Tim got her an apartment in Wayne tower after her life was flipped upside down showed how important she was to him. Now, Mary Smith was slowly paying back the money to the bank.

Bruce had to admit, Mary smith was indeed a good addition to Wayne labs but Tim didn't reserve every new employee an apartment.

The sound of her laughter was coming from the other side when Bruce rang the bell. She opened the door and her smile dropped immediately. Her curly blonde hair was a mess barely kept back by tens of hair pins. Mary cleared her throat and closed the door just a notch. "Hello. Mr Wayne." she said politely.

"I'm here for Tim." Bruce demanded with a frown. She was stronger than her so all he had to do was push the door and walk in even if Mary was doing her best to top him.

Bruce paid her no mind. She entered and looked around the living room. She was alone. The TV was on and an opened bag of chips laid on her couch.

Mary narrowed her eyes and slammed the door shut. "I told you on the phone, Mr Wayne, he's not here." she said as a matter of fact.

"I don't believe you." Bruce replied and went to the first open door and the second and the third. "Tim don't make me search your friends apartment." Bruce shouted and stepped inside. He turned around towards the last door. Suddenly Mary appeared in front of him with the angriest face anyone had ever seen on her face.

"Mr Wayne, this is my house and I'm asking you to leave, now." she said loudly but politely, blocking The man's path with her body.

"My son is here."

"Let's assume he is, what gives you the right to barge in?" she shouted. "You're in Bruce Wayne's attire, sir. Not Batman's."

Bruce narrowed his eyes. His Batman voice slipped into place. "Then you know exactly what I'm capable of," he stated.

Mary did not back off. She wasn't a punk on the street of a criminal. Mary knew she wasn't even confronting Batman right now. She was confronting a confused father.

Bruce took a step forward and that woman a batglare. Mary was scared to the bone, but she didn't move one inch.

A weak voice broke the violent tension in the room. They both turned to the figure of Tim standing behind Mary

"It's Ok Mary." Tim said and walked out of the guest room and put a hand on Mary's shoulder. He locked his eyes with his father. Bruce didn't frown, smile or show any other dominant emotion but Tim could read this man like he could read a book. He was worried, probably for the first time since he lost Jason.

Tim broke their eye contact and looked at Mary with an apologetic smile. "It's useless to argue with him in this case." he murmured.

Bruce fixed the ends of his sleeve with a frown. "Tim. We are going home." he demanded, not waiting for Tims answer.

Tim closed his eyes and sighed loudly. This was going to be a long way home and he knew it. Tim slowly turned to Mary and nodded politely. He weakly opened his arms and took Mary in a big hug. Mary was taken aback for a moment but Tim refused to let go. A goner knows when the time has come.

Mary slowly and hesitantly wrapped her arms around him and closed her eyes. Tim relaxed a little. "I'm sorry." Tim murmured quietly and broke the hug. Mary tried to smile but her eyes gave her sadness away. "No problem, I didn't do anything." she murmured.

Tim pressed his mouth to a thin. He let go and walked away to his father. Tim slowly Waved as Bruce closed the door and shut their connection off.

Bruce didn't say anything as he guided both of them to the car. Bruce started the car and didn't utter a word until they were in manor grounds, car safely in the parking lot. Bruce and Tim stayed inside as the motor died down and silence settled.

Tim rested his head against the window. "So... Silent treatment?" He murmured quietly. Bruce took his eyes off the front glass and stared at Tim. "Careless." Bruce spat out. "Running out of the hospital tim, really?"

Tim rolled his eyes. "If I'm well enough to sneak out of the hospital, I'm well enough to visit a friend." he reasoned.

Bruce rubbed the bridge of his nose and opened the door. Tim rolled his eyes and followed him out. "You've scared everyone." Bruce stated. "Even Damian, he punched a kid yesterday Because he made a comment about you."

Tim raised an eyebrow, "really." he muttered. Bruce nodded and pressed the button to the elevator. "You won't believe." Bruce hummed thoughtfully. "Dick got the last four days off work to look for you. We searched every known hide out of you and the titans and we couldn't find a trace. Damian suggested you might be abducted by the league of assassins. Cassandra was... heavily.. --allet class... Teachers said... Concentra---... No ha--.... H... Ti--?"

Tim took a deep breath. Bruce's words started to make no sense. He could see Bruce's mouth moving but the things he heard didn't sync with what he saw. The background around Bruce started to spin. Tim turned his head to see Bruce's face but instead of Bruce's face he saw a rapidly growing dark spot.

The last coherent thing he realised was When His name left Bruce's mouth.

"Tim!"

Tim tried to grip the wall and stay standing but his vision just consisted of colorful stars now his hands were growing weak.

His hand never reached the wall.

He could feel his upper body hit the ground. The faint pain enabled him from breathing for a moment. He gasped loudly but he couldn't hear it himself.

Tims eyes closed and no matter how much he tried it stayed closed.

And his mind slowly started to shut down.

==========

"Tim Wayne in a coma! Gothams legendary heartbreaker got a taste of his own medicine as a mysterious lover had made him yet another victim of Hanahaki!"  
\-- Gotham gazette.

"CEO of Wayne Enterprises, Tim Wayne, latest victim of Hanahaki"  
\-- Star City magazine.

"Tim Wayne pronounced comatose after escaping the hospital a week prior."  
\--east coast newspaper.

"Tim Wayne, CEO of Wayne Enterprises, falls into a hanahaki induced coma, Future still unclear."  
\--the Daily Planet.

==========

The news of Tim Wayne going into a coma with barely any sign of life was a cover page news. Every single gotham magazine published something about it and it didn't take long for it to reach the regretful ears of Mary Smith.

Mary found herself infront of Gotham general hospital a few weeks later, dressed as darkly as could to blend in with the afternoon sky. Tim's family would be patrolling the city right now. Mary closed her eyes and stepped in, every person assumed she was yet another reporter looking for a scoop.

It took a while but after finding the back door and miraculously evading security. She got inside. Mary however, was stopped from entering tims room.

"Only family." the old nurse said. "And you ain't no Wayne."

When the nurse left and Mary tried to open the door, she found out it opened with a card, one which she didn't have. Frustrated and tired, she slumped back on the nearby chair. And pulled her hair back, trying to even out her breathing.

She had never felt so guilty in her entire life. Nervousness was gripping his throat like iron and stopping her from breathing naturally. The moment she realised Tim could have been standing, talking, breathing on his own if she had called Bruce Wayne and told him Tim was hiding in her apartment a week prior.

A nurse's voice snapped her out of her thoughts. "Are you Mary Smith?" The nurse asked.

Mary looked up and pushed her hair out of her face to see the nurse in blue clearly. "Yes... it's me." she murmured with a tired voice. "How may I help you?"

The nurse pointed at Tims locked room. "Are you here to see Mr Drake-Wayne?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Mary nodded with a frown.

"Ms I require an identification." she said and opened her palm to get a card from her. Mary raised an eyebrow as she quietly found the first thing she could get her hand on, her driving license.

The nurse nodded and swiped her card in front of Tims door and it opened. Mary couldn't believe her luck, she jumped inside the room and slowly, very slowly walked closer to the bed, as if the person sleeping on it could wake up with the slightest sounds.

Mary slowly walked next to the bed and hesitantly looked around. Tim didn't look like he was in a peaceful sleep, the machines were breathing for him, beating his heart and making sure he stayed alive. Worse, his eyes were covered with white medical tape, keeping it closed.

"Oh dear." Mary said and stared at Tims face. She could never get that image out of her mind. She slowly covered her mouth and walked back, clumsily hitting the opposite wall.

The nurse cleared her throat to get her attention. Mary hesitantly looked at her.

"Mr Drake-Wayne's will was updated. He has appointed you the full permission to order his Euthanasia." The nurse said, her eyes went back to the young man lying unconscious on the sheets.

Mary's mind failed to form coherent words. Her eyes widened and he couldn't stop them from becoming heavy with tears. "W--What?" she whispered and tried desperately to blink the tears away.

"Euthanasia is the practice of intentionally ending a life to relieve pain and suffering. The legal documents are here." she said and put them on the table. "If you may want to talk to his doctor, you can just ask me."

Mary walked to the place where the nurse had put the legal documents. She shuffled them aimlessly and realised she couldn't focus enough to read it. "Yes." she murmured. "I wanna talk with the doctor, there's a... There is a lot to discuss."

Thr nurse nodded politely. "I see you care." she murmured. "Hanahaki patients usually... They usually give a stranger their permission to just let them be killed." the nurse murmured, her brown eyes softened for a moment when she saw the pure horror in Mary's eyes. "Think very clearly." The nurse left the room, leaving Mary alone in the sound of the machinery keeping Tim alive.

Mary just stared at the small information book on the table for minutes before she mustered up the strength to pick it up and start reading. She cursed Tim under her breath for putting her under such a burden.

Mary read one paragraph of a page and moved on to the next, he didn't want to busy her thoughts with useless scenarios. This guide book was supposed to help her not confuse her further.

"in case the beloved of the Hanahaki victim is dead surgery is often advised but end in sever amnesia and forgetting all about the belove--"

She moved on to the next before rushing back. Mary's eyes widened. That single paragraph alone saved Tim Drake's life for better or the worse. Mary looked at the documents again to make sure it was all real.

"If Tim ever finds out, he'll hate me for life." she whispered to herself as she closed the book. A small smile crept up to her face. Then she turned to Tims unconscious body. She took a deep breath. "I know how precious your memories are... But it's not like the Superboy is going to come back from the dead? And I'm not ordering your murder, tim. Not for something like this. Not for something you knew I never understood or felt." She gently touched the aromantic pride flag Pin Tim made for him when they were kids, it was the only thing she carried around regularly, on a shirt or a coat.

She was about to grab the documents and run to Wayne manor when the door was Banged open and Bruce Wayne stepped inside. Anger and frustration leaking from his body language. He growled quietly. "I don't remember to give you permission to be here, Ms Smith." he said angrily.

A hopeful smile appeared on Mary's face. She turned to Bruce Wayne and cheered. "I know who it is." Mary whispered, going straight to the point. "I know who Tim has fallen in love with." 

Bruce narrowed his eyes, aiming that vengeful look at Mary once again. "Start. Talking." He barked like Mary was another criminal on the streets.

==========

When Tim opened his eyes, he was surrounded by family. He felt his lungs expand and take as much air as it could before he recognised the four other people in the room.

Dick, Bruce, Cassandra and... Damian. Seeing worry in the first three faces happened on a daily basis but Damian. Damian wasn't frowning and his look had a touch of sadness to it that Tim couldn't quite explain. Damian averted his gaze the moment Tims eyes landed on him.

"Oh, Dr Glassman said you'll wake up soon after the surgery." Dick said with a smile. He moved forward to ruffle Tims uneven hair.

Tim raised an eyebrow. "What surgery?" he murmured thoughtfully. Dick immediately drew his hand back. Tim could feel the others tense too. Cassandra put her hands on Damians and carried both of them out, leaving tim alone with the older men.

Bruce came closer and hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. "What's the last thing you remember?" he asked seriously.

Tim raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "I don't know... I went to bed last night I guess. In the manor." he explained.

"What date do you think today is?"

"Bruce, why are you asking these?"

Dick shook his head. "Just answer the question Tim." he assured him silently, which made Tim even more suspicious.

Tim hummed thoughtfully. Remembering the past accidents seemed harder than it should have been. "I'm not sure but I think we're in the middle of March?" he guessed. "I think I just came back from a mission with... With..."

Both Dick and Bruce leaned closer, listening closely to what he was about to say.

"Cassie and Bart... I think..." Tim murmured and massaged the sides of his head. "Why is my mind so foggy?" he asked the two seriously.

They exchanged a look. Dick wanted to speak but Bruce beat him to it. "You had an encounter with an unknown chemical as Tim Wayne." Bruce said confidently.

That beat Dick yo silence but He didn't give it out. He nodded silently and pressed his mouth to a thin line. "As we expected, it causes you some amnesia." Bruce said.

Tim took a deep breath and nodded. "Im fine Bruce." he assured his adoptive father. "I may not remember things clearly but I don't think it's the first time I get hit with some chemical mumbo jumbo." he said with a laugh.

That comment actually made the tip of Bruce's lip go upwards. Dick was smiling. "Well Bruce... I think he'll be alright." Dick commented and pushed Tim back to lie on the bed. "Get some rest now Baby bird. We'll go talk to your doctor."

Tim nodded and watched both of them go away, much happier than what they were before he woke up.

Tim took a deep breath and leaned back. What had he forgotten? It didn't look like he had forgotten something. His mind was just foggy sometimes, like he was trying to remember a forgotten dream.

Tim looked around the room. There was no decoration in the room, just white tile floors and blue walls. Tim himself was wearing a blue hospital dress.

He doubted he'd ever worn a hospital gown.

There was just a picture of the family on the nearby table. Tim remembered it very clearly. A sunny Friday out in the Wayne Gardens and it was spent with miraculously zero incidents. In the end Alfred insisted on getting a family photo since it was so rare to the entire family together these days.

Tim stared at the strawberry frame, he could remember those days at least.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when a nurse arrived. He looked at Tim with a questioning look. "Im sorry sir but there is someone that wants to see you... But your family hasn't granted permission for her." he explained.

Tim raised an eyebrow. "Who is it?" he asked.

"Her name is Mary Smith."

"Mary?" Tim murmured and raised an eyebrow. "Why is she here? Please let her in."

The nurse left the room and Mary flew inside. For the first few moments, a big basket of chocolate was hiding her face. Her red jacket hugged her figure and the rest of her clothing was completely black. Her uneven blonde curls danced in the air and she gave the nurse a dirty look before she turned to see Tim with one of her biggest smiles. "Well Helloooo Mr CEO." she said.

Tim took a moment to take it all in. Tim didn't remember seeing Mary since... Well since they moved out of Gotham all those years ago. Tim let out a deep breath. He was about to call the nurses because the Mary he knew would never come visit him unannounced, her parents will never let her be an uninvited guest.

He gave her a frown and was about to press the button to call the medical staff when he saw the Aromantic pride flag pin on her jacket. Tim might not remember much. But he did remember making that pin. He did remember searching the entire Drake house for green, grey and black pieces of clothes to sew on the pin. He remembered the pure look of joy that passed Mary's face when he gave it to her.

As weird as it was, this girl was really Mary Smith.

Mary put the chocolates on the table. Tim hesitantly pointed at the pin on her jacket with a smile. "You kept it..." he murmured happily.

Mary snorted. He pulled out a chair and sat on it next to Tims bed. "Course I did." she said with a shrug. "Anyway... I was just making sure you don't hate me right now. Are you feeling ok after... everything?"

"Wait... We know each other"

Mary just gave him a look. "Last I checked, yes, we know each other." she said with a mocking tone. Tim slowly shook his head in denial. Mary's eyes widened. "You don't remember." she murmured as the realisation settled in.

Tim nodded silently. "A little bit-- Uhm--" he tried to say but decided against it. "How long?"

Mary rolled her eyes. "For more than a year now." she said with a smile. Suddenly her smile fell and she stood up to leave. "I think I shouldn't have come here."

"I can't say anything about that but..." Tim said hesitantly. "It was nice hearing from you again Mary."

A slight smile touched Mary's face. "I'm glad to see you're alive tim." She said and put her hand on his before she turned around to leave.

Something about her touch triggered a deep buried memory inside his brain. He was suddenly bombarded with dream-like visions in a church, Wayne labs and an apartment he couldn't exactly pinpoint.

And pain...

"I... Employed you in Wayne labs." Tim whispered quietly. Mary froze on spot. She slowly turned around and looked at Tims stunned face. All color had left her face. "What else do you remember?" she murmured.

"We met in... A church after your parents... Oh." Tim bit his tongue right on time. Mary shook her head.

"Im sorry Tim I shouldn't have come here." Mary murmured and bit her lip. "Tell Mr Wayne I was sorry... I'll visit you again after the doctors deem it good "

Mary left the room without further explanation. Tim was left alone with a bunch of chocolates and many many unanswered questions.

==========

It was another week before Mary was allowed to visit Tim. A whole week of nothing happening and everything crashing down at Tim at once.

Everyday, he got more questions and less answers. Bruce avoided answering him and Dick said absolutely nothing. Cassandra and Damian kept on their silence and the unreasonable anger just grew inside his body.

That was, until he actually got to look at his body for the first time since waking up. There were many scars that were supposed to be there and a few surgical scars that were _definitely_ not supposed to be there.

But he felt well enough to continue his work as Tim Wayne and get back to WE even if Bruce insisted he should take a few days off. Tim shrugged off his worries and he didn't remember anything from the attack.

There was an anger buried deep inside of him and he didn't know why. Every time he asked what led up to the "attack" on his life that he needed the surgery, there was a slight pause in everyone. Expect Damian, who claimed not to know anything.

Those slight pauses made Tim suspicious. Tim started to doubt that story when he stepped foot on Wayne Enterprises and found no actual evidence that any attack had taken place.

Bruce always said he was too smart for his own good.

Soon, he realised the story of someone attacking him with an unknown chemical, making critical and giving him amnesia was a fake. He found himself staying overshift on top of Wayne Enterprises roof and leaning down the railings. Watching the sky and it's beautiful painted colors.

Tim was strangely at peace with not knowing what happened, there was a lot of stuff he didn't know about.

A "ding" rang in the air which told Tim someone was coming to the rooftop. He sighed loudly and turned his gaze to the back. He saw Mary in her lab coat, curly blonde hair pulled back for once, holding a bunch of yellow coral roses.

She smiled bitterly while handing him the flowers. "Hey, sorry about the other day." she said simply. Mary looked at the sunset and then closed her eyes, feeling the wind on her skin. Tim took the flowers and breathed in its scent.

_Coral rose: friendship, modesty, sympathy_

Tim put the flowers aside. "It's ok, thanks," he murmured, turning back to the stunning view.

The silence was cleansing their soul and Tim appreciated it so much. Until he felt like the unanswered questions were laying heavy between them, potentially damaging their friendship.

Tim took a deep breath. "Why was I angry, Mary?" Tim murmured quietly as he stared at the sunset. He turned around to see his friend's eyes shifting nervously. "I must have told you about it."

"You... You did." Mary admitted, looking directly into Tims eyes.

The moment of truth was now, although he knew Mary wouldn't answer him currently and deep down, he didn't really know if he wanted to hear the truth. "Who was it? Was it a boy? A girl?" Tim asked. "Tell me about them."

Mary's eyes widened. "What are you--"

Tim turned around and Mary couldn't bear to look at Tims pained eyes anymore. Tim smiled painfully at his friend. The memory of the first day Tim read about the mythical duty of aromatics fresh in his mind. "I saw the scars, Mary." Tim murmured softly. "You've stabbed me with an arrow."

==========

The Robins nest was clearer than he imagined it would be, there were clear signs of a person visiting every once in a while and Tim dreaded to think who it might be.

Red Robin didn't want much from this place, just a case file and he could go back to the batcave to assist others with their patrol. Tim searched one file after another but hid reports had seemingly disappeared.

"Tim..."

Mary's voice echoed in the room. The light entered the office from behind and she appeared like a dark ghost in the doorframe. "What are you doing here this late?" she asked hesitantly.

Tim crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing here? How could you get in?" he asked angrily, holding the folder way too close to himself.

Mary sighed loudly. "Don't worry you gave me the keys." she assured him.

Tim turned back to the computer. "Why would I give it to you?" he murmured, scanning the rest of the file on his computer.

Her footsteps came closer. "It's a long story." she said with a shrug. "And I had to handle the meeting... Again."

Tim froze for a moment before he ran a hand through his hair. "Oh man, I forgot about it completely." he muttered and glanced over at Mary. Mary just laughed. "Don't worry, It was just Wayne labs. I handled it and postponed the real for tomorrow... I came here to check up on you that's all."

Tim smiled at her before going back to his work. He got an error, with a frown, he tried the code again and got the same results again. Again and again and again.

Mary sighed loudly. "So what is it that's keeping Mr CEO away from Wayne Enterprises?" she asked curiously.

"It's about Clayface." Tim muttered and turned off the computer. He slowly put his cowl back on. White lenses move around to get accustomed to it again.

"Wow! Wow! Slow down you're still in rest." Mary said loudly. Red Robin ignored it. He just rolled his eyes.

"I'm just going to the titans tower for paperwork." He said as a matter of fact.

Mary hopped off the table she was sitting on. "Im tagging along." she said as a matter of fact.

Tim rolled his eyes and picked up Wayne tech's latest technology. Teleportation orbs, teleporters just like mother boxes. He could put the destination in it and be there in moments. "Are you pulling my leg, Mary. It's Titans tower. I might not remember much but I Don't think I had ever taken you there."

Mary stood next to him. Tim just realised she was wearing a long dark coat. She took out shades from her pocket and put it on. "Well." she said confidently. "I'm not letting you go alone. And by the way, I made these." She tapped the metallic teleporter in Tims hand. "You have no idea how it works. It'll take you approximately 1 minute to figure out and that's more than enough time for me to call Mr Wayne. And stop you."

Tim smirked. "That's blackmailing." he murmured and handed her the orb. She updated the setting to teleport two people. "I know." Mary said with a shrug. Soon, Tim felt ticklish and reality started to alter around him. "Desperate measures."

They appeared in the center of titans tower. A happy sound of celebrating could be heard upstairs. Tim looked up and saw that the ceiling was shaking slightly from the impact of their party. He sighed loudly and turned to Mary. "Stay here I'll be back in a minute."

Mary nodded with a shrug and went the opposite way, curios of why the Titans were celebrating in this ungodly hour. When Mary looked back, Tim was already gone.

Mary rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I hate this stupid ninja move." he murmured. Before she could even blink and decide to follow the party, a dead man appeared from the corner of her vision. A second glance proved that she'd seen right.

Mary dropped her phone, its screen broke into a thousand pieces and Mary couldn't bring herself to care. Her tongue was unable to produce a coherent word.

Infront of her was their famous troublemaker. The same person who Tim fell deeply in love with. She thought she was seeing a ghost when she saw those blue eyes, black hair and that unmistakable red S shield.

Conner's eyes widened. "Agent M?" he said with a smile. The left side of Conner's face was burned and almost unrecognizable.

Mary's blood ran cold. She must have been hallucinating. Mary had only ever heard that voice once but she knew who it belonged to. She cautiously took a step back.

"Im suprised to see you here." he said with a smile and came forward. Mary wanted to scream: "zombie" and run away. then she remembered Tim was actually in the tower.

Tim was in the tower. Right around the corner when he can come out and see superbo--

Conner was seemingly alive and Mary had _utterly_ screwed up.

Conners' smile widened and he laughed. "You're here and that means..." he trailed off.

"No! Wait Tim is--"

"Tim is here!" Conner said and dashed away, leaving Mary in the dust.

Conner flew and flew, following the all too familiar heartbeat of Tim Drake until he reached it. Tim, in his Red Robin suit, searching the papers, looking for a clue. Conner's being was filled with happiness when he saw Tim freeze and look back at the door, trying to see who the newcomer was.

Conner didn't wait to see Tims initial reaction. He dashed forward and took Tim in the tightest bear hug he could and lifted them both up.

A thousand year coma, a few days in the 31st century and traveling around timelines had given Conner a lot of time to think and a lot of things to confess, especially to the boy he was holding in his arms at the moment.

Conner was surprised to see Tims heart spike in fear and not excitement or happiness. Conner didn't have time to be shocked as something exploded between the two teens and Conner had to let go of Red Robin to save his burning t-shirt.

With a complicated flip, Red Robin landed on his feet, another batarang ready in hand and looking at Conner like he was the greatest threat of all.

Conner tried to wipe away the dust off his face at his own stupidity. Conner had years to come to term with his feelings with his best friend and he couldn't just ask out for a date, fresh at the land of the living. Not to mention his face was ruined and scarred, it would take another few hours for it to heal completely.

Conner took a deep breath and evened out his emotions. "Ok, Tim, sorry I startled you but...Tim, buddy... I missed you so much." Conner murmured.

Tims eyes remained fixed and calculating. He didn't say a word and didn't change his posture. Conner half expected for Tim to pull out a kryptonite batarang and stab him to death again but he didn't. He was just there, planning his next move.

He was saved by Bart and Cassie zooming into the room with Agent M following quickly behind them. Agent M froze and put her hand on her mouth. She just kept staring, at loss of what to do.

"Woo woo, Rob, slow down." Bart zoomed and stood between them. "It's really him. He's our superboy."

That didn't soothe Tims worries one bit but he changed from his attacking posture to a less intimidating one. Tim lifted his chin up and inspected the boy in front of him. Tim couldn't stop thinking about how handsome he was or how his mesmerizing blue eyes was slowly stealing his soul (again).

"Superboy." Tim murmured softly, tasting the words in his mouth. Hope blossomed in Conner's face before it was crushed in a moment.

"Im sorry, but..." Tim said completely seriously, looking at Conner. From the corner of his eyes, he could see Mary flinch and look away. He paid it no mind and looked at the boy with the magnificent blue eyes: "I don't know who you are."

Those words wouldn't have hurt Conner so much if he couldn't hear Tims heartbeat and the truthfulness of those words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments or leave a kudos XD 💜💜


	5. Conner comes home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiiiii everything ok?
> 
> So sorry for the last chapters cliffhanger. 💜 here is the new chapter and the happier themes slowly start. 
> 
> The next chapter will be the last and hopefully, it will turn out happier than my previous Hanahaki story.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

Dejavu had never been stronger. Tim could only watch as the joy in the strange boy's face slowly crumbled. The injuries on his face became so much worse to the eyes when his smile dropped.

Bart and Cassie gasped loudly in the background and Mary just.... Disappeared.

Unbeknownst to him, Mary crawled away from them and sat on a corner, evaluating her life choices and low-key panicking.

The boys eyes softened and he pointed at the S Shield in his chest. Tim wanted to chuckle. That S shield would be an interesting news to superman.

The boy pointed at his chest and walked closer. Tim cautiously took a step back, never breaking their eye contact or his batglare. "It's me, Tim... Its Kon..." he murmured. His blue eyes started to shine.

Tim shook his head. "I don't know any Kons." he states firmly. His frown deepened dramatically. Tim turned to Cassie and Bart, who were standing between them, both of them at loss of what to say. "Wondergirl, kid flash... Who is this? And how does he know my name?" he demanded to know.

Bart's mouth dropped. "Tim... It's not funny anymore." he murmured.

Conner shook His head shamefully. "It's no joke." Conner murmured and gently stepped forward, passing both Bart and Cassie. Tim immediately drew out his batarang, ready to attack the person. He held the profile he came for carefully in his free hand.

Tim saw a load of sadness and unshed tears in those blue eyes. Tim felt bad for him, truly, there was nothing he could do about it. Kon tried to take Tims hand into his own but stopped midway. "I-- you really don't know me." he murmured softly, "it's me tim, it's kon."

Tim just wiggled the file in his hand and stepped away from them. "Look... I... I have no idea what you're talking about." he said confidently. He hit Conners steel chest to get him to step away from his path. "Now if you let me. I have work to do."

Tim could have been less harsh. Judging by Bart and Cassies shocked expressions something was really wrong but he didn't have time to guess what. He had a wayward friend to find and a criminal to catch.

His cape moved in the air as he stepped out of the room. Leaving three people in stunned silence. Bart, Cassie and Conner didn't say a word until they saw the teleporters working on the other side.

Conner was stunned beyond imagination. The entire plans he made about confessing things and not confessing other things to Tim turned to dust right in front of him.

==========

Conner didn't know he rushed out of the titans tower that night. All that he remembered was that after Tim left, Bart and Cassie tried to explain things to him but even they didn't know what was really wrong.

Conner sneaked out of titans tower and spent the night on top of a hiking mountain in a sub-zero atmosphere to cool his nerves.

The next day when he woke up, he could hear the entire justice league looking for him. Conner could clearly hear Jon shouting his name all the way from Kansas. He knew he should have really answered him, say he's alright at least, but talking to Jon also means confronting Superman... And he doesn't want to confront Superman and his endless questions.

Conner buried his hands in the snow. He was sitting above the mountains and underneath his feet were clean white clouds. The sun was just a faded white circle in the sky. He missed being so relaxed. He had spent the last year hoping from one timeline to another, trying to find his way home from the 31st century. If it wasn't for that mysterious ping from this world, he might have been lost for an ungodly amount of time.

He took out the small time travel device the legion of superheroes had given him from the 31st century. It was small, smaller than a box of matches, but it did its job by fusing into Conners body and teleporting him elsewhere. It only had a screen and a buzzer, the louder it buzzed, the closer Conner was to being home. Right then, it was buzzing loudly.

About two days ago he received a message from across the timelines, an address. He followed it and reached home. Conner didn't know who sent it, but there was no way the codes were the Justice Leagues.

There was a lot he needed to explain, he knew that, but right then he couldn't handle an interrogation from superman or Batman.

There was only one place in the world that was free of superman's influence. A smile crept up Conner's face as he slowly levitated above the ground.

LexCorp... More specifically, Lex Luther.

He dashed in the sky, he had to hurry. The Justice league must have seen him by now and he didn't have much time. Conner arrived in Metropolis and set his eyes on the superb tower in the city center with the giant L.

He was about to land on the balcony. In his mind, he rehearsed the words he wanted to say, in truth, he didn't have anything to say to this particular DNA donor. All across the timelines there were more than enough likable versions of Lex Luther that Conner wanted to give his Lex Luther a chance.

Suddenly, the time travel device started buzzing madly. Conner hesitantly took it out and tried to turn it off but couldn't. The sound of it was starting to give him a headache. Finally he found the right buttons and tuned the sound down.

Why would it start buzzing so loudly now? Conner couldn't have gotten closer to home, could he?

By the time he was finished, there were two extra heart beats present. Conner looked up to see Lex Luther and Mercy giving him equally unamused glares from the other side of the glass doors of the balcony. Conner smiled awkwardly and waved as a hello.

Lex turned to his body guard and nodded. Mercy gave Conner one final glare before she stepped away, disappearing into the other room.

Lex opened the balcony door and stepped closer, Giving Conner his famous businessman smile. "I see the rumors were true. You're back in the land of the living."

Conner hummed. "Yes." he said shortly. The wheels in his mind trying to find out the reason behind his time travel devices bizarre behavior before realization settled in.

Lex stepped forward, apparently not too afraid of being close with a half-kryptonian. "What happened to you." Lex asked curiously. "I saw you... die." he said the words like it pained him to say it. Conner's smile softened a little.

"A Lot has happened, really..." Conner murmured.

Lexs eyes focused on the various burn scars across Conner's face. They were healed but still there. "I can see that." Lex stated sadly.

"Thanks for... Helping me get back."

"I did nothing." Lex stated immediately, he narrowed his eyes and took a step back. At this point, Conner was familiar with all his reactions.

"Yes you did." Conner murmured. "It was your signal that brought me home. You sent a signal through the timelines so that I could find my way back with it."

Lex narrowed his eyes. "That wasn't me, kid." he said again.

Conner chuckled. "There must be a traitor among you then... Because the signal is coming right from your office." He said and gently put the device on the nearby coffee table. The grey box was beeping madly, signalling that they were near.

Lex sighed in defeat and looked back at his office, turning his back to Conner. "Anything else you want to say, superboy? Or should I even call you that? Since the younger one took it."

That's true, Jon honored the mantle of Superboy by choosing to let it live again. Conner was thankful, really, it was past time he moved on from that title.

Conner turned his back to Lex too. But now, he had too much to stay and keeping those thoughts buried deep into his mind was slowly infecting physical pain. "We were close." Conner admitted, looking at Metropolis skyline. "At many of the timelines I visited we were close, father-son sort of close."

Lex rolled his eyes. To him, this conversation was over. All he wanted was for This boy to be back home. Now he's back, lex has no obligation to stick to him anymore.

_even if Lex pushed his staff and himself to work to their limit the moment he realised Superboy was lost in time._

Lex stepped closer to the door to go back into his office and leave the boy alone. Superboy would leave after a while out of boredom.

"I had even named my kid after you in some timelines."

That made Lex stop. His hand froze above the handle and he turned back. Superboy was sitting on the edge of the roof and looking with him with raw hope. "Made me wonder if I could have the same thing with you."

Lex narrowed his eyes. Lex stepped forward to stand beside him. A slow smile appeared on Superboy's face. They both looked at the view in blissful silence, enjoying the touch of wind and lively view.

"I doubt the big blue would like to see you here." Lex said as a matter of fact. "And I'm aware you've had a hard time staying on his good side when you were... Present?."

Conner nodded absentmindedly. "Yeah well... Kal... Kal is good." he admitted, fidgeting with his hand nervously. "It's just... I don't want to see him right now. Although I really miss Jon."

Lex had to admit the boy looked tired and defeated. His hair was completely out of place because of the long, fast flight he must have had before he reached LexCorp. a giant burn mark covered the right side of his face that would have made him unrecognizable if Lex didn't have his photo plastered all over his worklab.

But whatever happened he shouldn't be here. And Lex knew that. Lex took a deep breath. "Listen, superboy--"

The boy interrupted him. "Kon." Conner murmured softly, looking up at lex with tired blue eyes. "My name is Kon. Or Conner... If you're more comfortable with that."

"Conner." Lex said, tasting the taste of the word. "It suits you..." he lied. Conner nodded and hummed. He closed his eyes and let himself breathe easily. "Thanks for bringing me back." He whispered, his voice barely audible.

Lex smiled and hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. Conner almost flinched away from the touch but he forced himself to keep still. "Don't mention it kid." Lex stated. "But I know for a fact something else is bothering you that got you here."

Conner chuckled. "Can't I just come here to say hello?" he whispered. Lex raised an eyebrow at him.

Conner rolled his eyes. "The Batman is after me. He wants to know how I'm alive." Conner murmured. "And... Normally I would have hid behind Robin but now... I don't think that's an option."

"Robin."

"Red Robin. Man that's confusing."

"And why can't you?"

Conner hummed thoughtfully. He didn't know how but...

Conner knew he shouldn't spill his secrets like this. But the burden of keeping them a secret was choking him out. He anxiously played with his fingers. "Every one of my doppelgangers had a Red Robin on his side... Sometimes platonically... More times Romantically." he murmured.

Lex raised an eyebrow. "As in Tim Drake-Wayne?" he asked, disgusted and impressed at the same time.

Conner nodded. "Most of the time the other father of the said grandchild of yours was Tim." he said as a matter of fact. "You helped us clone him."

Lex smiled. "Interesting." he hummed. "Did you get to meet him? Was he functional?"

Conner was taken aback. "Functional?" Was that really a word lex Luther just used to describe his own grandchild? Conner sighed. Of course he would ask that, conner just dropped the fact that Alex- his doppelgangers kid- was a clone.

"I only got to meet one of them." Conner admitted and dropped his head. "Almost every version of me was overprotective towards his child. They didn't even let me know they existed most of the time... But there was this one occasion... I saw him... I saw Alex..."

"And why did this version of you ok with that?"

Conner titled his head a little, setting his eyes on the other man. "He was dead. They were both dead... Tim and the other Kon I mean..." Conner muttered quietly. "And Alex was... Alex was in your custody. I spent a lot of time talking to that Lex... That's why I'm here... My subconscious feels at ease with you around."

Lex raised an eyebrow. The other lex would comment about how illogical it was to compare the two but he was too mentally tired to think about it anymore. Lex hummed thoughtfully. "I can't imagine myself raising a child." He admitted. "Let alone going on a custody battle with Batman."

Conner chuckled. "That's what shocked me too. But anyway... The Batman of that world was Rob's Sister, here she goes by Black Bat. I helped them defeat that worlds Staro... And well... They let me stay in the watchtower Until I was healed enough to travel again." He said.

"And that's where you saw him."

Conner took a deep breath and nodded silently, looking aimlessly at his hands. "I saw a boy flying around the watchtower trying to be sneaky. Alex was a boy this tall... Grey eyes, jet Black hair and a spitting image of superman as a kid... That I didn't recognise at first. I grabbed him and held him up by his ancle. He broke my grip like it was nothing and landed a kick right in my face. Shit hurt."

Lex laughed shortly and Conner glared at him.

"So I followed him and he ran away. It didn't take long for me to see that he was faster than humanly possible and more durable. He ran until he reached you in a corner and Hid behind you. Alex pointed at me like I was the bad guy and shouted: "Grandpa! There is an intruder in the watchtower!" " Conner said, mimicking the way a seven year old nagged.

Half of Lexs face pulled into a smile. Conner stopped his story. He dropped his hands and looked at Lex with the most defeated face he'd ever seen on the clones face. "I realise I could have had so much and didn't. It took me a trip to the underworld to realise that giggly feeling I had whenever I was around Tim was different." Conner sighed loudly and buried his face in his hands. "And... And I think I fell for my memories of him again and again. I missed him terribly and now he doesn't even remember me."

Lex shrugged it off. "That's not something to worry about, son." he said as a matter of fact. Suddenly he realized what he had said and backed off.

Conner's face lit up but he didn't comment in it. he looked away. "Do you think I still have a chance?" he murmured quietly.

Lex gripped the sides of the railing and then let go of it. "Follow me inside." he commanded. Conner wanted to object but he shrugged instead, choosing to follow the older man inside.

When the door closed behind him the lights shut down leaving them both in the darkness. A holo computer flared to life and lit up all around conner with various screens, all of newspaper articles.

"If you want to seduce your best friend then you should know all about what happened." Lex stated firmly.

"I never said that." he murmured quietly. Conner tried to touch the hologram. The photo was from when Tim had been released from the hospital. He looked fine but he was extremely pale, well, paler than he usually was. "He was gassed?" Conner asked.

With a flick of Lexs wrist a few more screens appeared. Conner's heart almost stopped when he saw the word HANAHAKI plastered all over them. His eyes widened and he looked at Lex, begging him to falsify them. Lex shook his head. "Wayne insisted these were false headlines rumored by Vicki Vale. The judges agree. I do not know and I did not care. Timothy seemed healthy enough to debate me last time we met."

Conner let out a breath of relief and closed the Hanahaki windows. "So that's why he doesn't remember me? Chemicals?" he asked.

"And a dangerous nuero-surgery." Lex added.

"Will he ever remember me again?"

The question hung in the air. Lex glared at his eyed without directly answering. "One can only hope." He said, deciding not to destroy this boy's hope on his first day back on the land of the living.

"Security alert." the robotic voice echoed in the room. The newspaper articles were taken to a side for the favor of a security camera, showing what was happening right outside the balcony. Out of the office there were two floating figures, one older and one extremely younger. Both wearing red and blue and their famous S shield. Conner smiled at their picture.

Jon had grown so much.

"You have anti-kryptonian weapons in this Building?" Conner asked, meant as a joke to lighten the deadly silence that fell between them.

Lex noticed that too but he decided to ignore Conners futile attempt. "Do you want to go?" he asked. Conner noded, not taking his eyes off the hologram.

Conner turned to look at lex. "I should.... I should really get going." Conner murmured. "Thanks for helping me out."

Before Lex could comment on anything he was being forced into a hug. It shocked him for a moment before he slowly and hesitantly pat Conner on the back. The first time he ever had this clone in his arms. Lex wanted it to happen again, there was a reason his doppelgangers liked Conners so much.

Conner smiled and let go, he dashed out of the room in an instant, before Lex could even blink.

Lexs eyes landed on the security feed again. Conner was slowly flying up to them, his mouth pressed into a thin line and unwilling to talk. Jonothan, the younger superboy jumped and tackled Conner while trying to hug him. No words were exchanged.

Lex could see two brothers who were happy to see each other alive and well.

"For what it's worth... I'm glad you could find your way back home." Lex admitted to the silence. He rubbed the bridge of his nose tiredly, there was so much he had to do.

With a flick of his wrist, the holocomputer was gone and Lex was engulfed in the shadows.

==========

"And that's it." Conner concluded, furiously tapping the table with his nails. His eyes darted from Batman to superman, to Martian manhunter and the whole other leaguers present during his interrogation, had turned to a presentation.

Flash buzzed in and took a thorough look at Conner. All Conner wanted to do was to smack the speedster across the face but the thought of Bart stopped him. Bart wouldn't have liked his grandpa losing half of his face because Conner got angry.

The flash stopped. He then turned to Batman with a shrug. "Well, the vibrations show he really is from this timeline." he stated. Conner pinched the bridge of his nose. "Thank you," he hissed. "Can I go now?"

"But I don't believe the rest of your story." Flash stated. "Repeat what you said."

"Again?" Conner almost ticked. "What's there to repeat? I woke up in the 31st century. They healed me, told me to go back to my time. The device was broken so it landed me in an alternative timeline. I started traveling through timelines to find my way home. A signal appeared and acted like an address. And now. I. Am. Here."

Wonder woman stepped forward. "I believe you, Kon-El." she said simply. She detangled her lasso of truth from her waist and pointed it towards him. "But if they want to test it. There is a safe way."

Conner resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He crossed his arms and looked away. "Whatever." he whispered. The lack of answer from the senior leaguers was enough evidence to show Conner that the justice league hadn't believed a word he'd said. Slowly he detangled his arms and stretched his right hand towards Diana. She gently handed him one side of the lasso and Conner held it tightly.

Diana pulled the lasso. Conner could see kindness in her eyes but that didn't soothe his disappointment at his once idols. "Who are you?" she asked simply.

"My name is Conner Kent, Kon-El. The former Superboy." Conner recited by heart. "A genome, a cadmus clone. A titan. A son and a brother.... And a walking dead."

Conner didn't mean to say the last part, it just slipped out of his mouth. It caused some of the leaguers visible discomfort. Even Superman looked away from Conner's burning gaze. Wonder woman shook her head. "What you said... Was it the truth... Only the truth and the whole truth?"

"Not wholly. I doubt all the people in this room want to listen to my everyday tasks and all the demons I fought with every now and then." Conner spilled out. "But it is the truth. The report I gave Batman has anything and everything about the baddies I faced."

Diana glanced back at her comrade. Batman nodded. Diana wanted to pull back her lasso but Batman stopped him. "What about the scar on your face. You never mentioned a fight that burned you." Batman demanded, the lenses in his cowl narrowed, trying to give him a batglare that, ironically, was common among all the Batmen.

Unconsciously, Conner reached a hand up to see the skin over his right eye was still rough and hurting. He shook his head. Conner looked around the rest of the superheroes present, his eyes landed on superman. "I think that's a private matter, Batman." he murmured.

Superman raised an eyebrow. "I don't think anything is private about this, Kon." he assured him.

Conner gripped the golden lasso tightly. Resisting it was futile and if they really wanted to know, who was he to stop them? "Fine." Conner hissed. "The last earth I visited was having an apokolips when I reached it. That time line was years into the future where a new generation of the JL had aroused and.... And my doppelganger and his husband were dead... When I arrived there, they were very protective of me and promised to get me back to my time. I met very interesting people there. Including my own son. But apokolips invaded them and I had to help-- this," Conner pointed at the burn scar all the right side of his face "is a gift from darksieds collection of kryptonite fused lava weapons. I almost burned away completely."

Batman nodded. "Understood." he stated like Conner had just recited a story. Batman ignored Conners obvious discomfort.

Superman raised an eyebrow. "Will it heal?" he asked curiously. Deep down, Conner knew he was worried that a weapon exists that can hurt a half kryptonian. He was worried for Jon. Conner shrugged carelessly. "That worlds Lex Luther said it'll heal in two weeks."

Two weeks.

Everyone knew that was too much time for a kryptonian level healing.

"How are you alive? If that weapon was so powerful." Batman asked, narrowing his eyes at Conner.

"Lucky for me, I wasn't the only half kryptonian powerhouse present at the time." he said with a sick smile. Superman titled his head a little. "Jon?" he asked shortly.

Conner shifted his gaze from Batman's eyes to Clarks. He wanted to laugh at the irony.

"No, I'm alive thanks to my half sister, Lara, daughter of Kal-El of Krypton..." Conner said, glancing at where Diana was standing. He didn't have to force the words out, the lasso spilled it for him "...And Diana of Themyscira''

The watchtower fell into deafening silence.

Conner looked over at where Superman and Batman were standing.

Nobody dared to utter a word.

Sure, everyone was fine when Conner was spilling out his own future. Everyone falls into silence when about theirs.

The silence was broken by superman. "Ok... Maybe it was a private matter." he said. Wonder woman chuckled and untangled her lasso from Conner's hand.

"Thanks." Conner murmured softly, standing up to leave. "It was nice seeing you all but I want to go now."

Batman stepped forward. "There is alot to discuss. You should stay here and clear your information." he stated-ordered. But Conner was done taking orders.

"What I am going to do Batman, is that I'm going to fix a few broken relationships." Conner hissed. "I've been jumping around crises this past half year and I'm done talking about it."

Batman narrowed his eyes and wanted to step forward but superman stopped him by gently putting a hand on his shoulder, stopping him from getting closer to Kon.

Kon nodded at Him as a silent thank you, without further words, Kon stepped inside the teleporters. He looked at every single one of the leaguers present before he materialized away.

==========

Tim woke up in cold sweat and a gasp ripped from his throat. His heart was hammering loudly in his chest, the aftermath of a dream he couldn't quite remember.

Sun, farm, and a farm boy that No matter how hard tim tried, his face remained a blur.

It was all fun and games and what felt like one of Ma Kents sweetest pies, until a green ray appeared from the sky and ruined everything.

It felt like a fairy tale. The sun was too yellow and the sky was too blue, Tim didn't when and with who, but he was sure he had experienced something like that in reality once in his life.

He wondered if this was really a memory he was remembering. Was this amnesia he was dealing with? Or a conscious desire not to remember.

Tim tried to close his eyes and fall back asleep, but he found himself aimlessly staring out of the window and at the beauty of the full moon.

Sleep wouldn't come to him that night.

Tim found his way to the kitchen. He made himself a cup of coffee in the deafening silence. The sun will be up in a few hours and he had so much work to do in WE that day.

Speaking of which, Tim took out his phone and called Mary. He was still confused about the latest meeting with Wayne Labs that she attended in his stead.

To his surprise, the phone went to voicemail.

"Hiiii! If it's mom and dad, I'm alive don't worry, but if it's anyone else, please leave a message!"

"Hey Mary, it's Tim." Tim murmured quietly so that no one could hear him. "I wanted to reschedule yesterday's meeting. call me back."

Tim ended the call and looked down at his phone. Mary had read neither of his messages. She even refused to make eye contact with him on the way back from Titans tower. Tim could read Guilt written all over her expressions but why? He didn't know.

He took a sip of his coffee and felt his brain start to charge up. He blinked a few times and the feeling of sleepiness slowly went away.

Tim felt her presence before he heard her footsteps. Tim put on a brave smile and turned around to see Cassandra standing at the door. She was in all black pajamas and ready for bed. There was a new stitch on the right side of her face, a souvenir from last night's patrol.

"Tim... Are you well?" Cassandra asked flatly. Tim chuckled and slowly shook his head. "I should ask you that question" he replied and put his cup aside. "You were the one injured last night."

Cassandra shook her head. She stepped closer and pointed her finger Right above Tims heart. Tim gently brushed her hand away. "No, I'm fine, really." he murmured. "I'm feeling well here," he pointed at his heart. "Bat's honor."

Cass smiled bitterly and nodded. "Titans tower." she murmured. "What were you doing?"

Tim shrugged carelessly. "I was looking for a file." he explained and rolled his eyes. "Things got complicated though."

Cassandra nodded knowingly. "Are you sure you're well." she asked again, not satisfied with the previous answers.

Tim nodded and picked up his coffee again. "Yup." he said, emphasizing on the P. "Go to sleep, Cass. I'll be fine."

Cass swallowed nervously before he tackled Tim in a bear hug. Tim was taken aback for a moment. He put his cup down and returned the hug. Cass didn't let go for a long time. For some strange reason, Tim was grateful for that.

Cass slowly let go and nodded. "Brother mine... Healthy." she murmured and stepped back. She slowly dissolved into the shadows and disappeared in the darkness of the night.

==========

Another closed door.

Another empty safehouse.

Conner sighed loudly as he closed the door of Tims last known hideout. The room had spider webs everywhere which meant Tim hasn't visited in a long long time.

Conner hummed thoughtfully. Bart was right, he should just go into Wayne manor for some proper conversation with Tim.

The wind blew slowly in the air and Gothams weather weather was getting more and more cool every day. This was the third day he sat on top of the hill nearby Wayne manor and hid in the trees. Everyday he promised himself he'd knock the door and go talk to Tim and... Maybe confess.

Conner took a deep breath and stood up. He could see Wayne Manor from here. His enhanced vision even allowed him to see Tim's room from up here. Tim was in his room and leaning against the windows staring outside.

Conner closed his eyes and hid behind the trees. Conner knew he was very lucky that kryptonians couldn't get Hanahaki. Or else, he'd be in so much trouble right now.

He could get a rose and fly to Tims room in the most Aladdin style possible but... Tim would freak out. Conner's heart clutched when he remembered that Tim wasn't lying when Tim said he didn't remember Conner.

Also, Conner was sure Batman had deathly kryptonite rays installed here somewhere. So Flying into Wayne manor was out of question.

So what could he do?

He could walk into the manor like a smart human being.

He did exactly that.

The metalic doors around the manor grounds were already open. Conner paid it no mind. He walked up until he reached the superb white manor itself. The giant wooden doors, no doubt installed with the best security systems, were beautiful to look at.

Conner reached out But before his hand could reach the door to knock. He felt a slight movement on his back and suddenly a deafening sound filled his mind. Conner gasped loudly and covered his ears. He took a few steps back and slowly... Slowly the sound started to decrease.

Conner took a deep breath and uncovered his ears. He frowned and looked around to see Damian standing behind him in the gardens, swords ready in hand and Titus barking next to him angrily.

"Begone, half-breed!" Damian shouted and ran towards the place Conner was standing. He jumped from the bushes and pointed the tip of his sword to Conner.

Conner just raised an eyebrow. Damian was fierce. His green eyes were leaking poison and hatred more than usual. Damuan hissed angrily before he drew his sword back. "Go away before I lose my patience." Damian spat angrily. "Go away before I do something that'll make you regret ever coming here."

Conner nonchalantly raised an eyebrow and chuckled. Jon had said something about getting closer to Damian in the 7 months he was dead. None of that included the fact that Damian had actually grown more violent.

"I don't think Jon will play with you more if you injure his newly-returned-from-the-grave brother?" Conner said with a smile.

Damian pushed his dog back and took a step closer. "Now, don't think you're so immune." Damian hissed, swinging his sword around as a threat. Conner just narrowed his eyes. "I know why you're here."

"Oh really"

"If I ever see you around Timothy or Red Robin, there will be severe consequences."

Conner was shocked to see Damian's face so determined to go against a kryptonian. From what he remembered Damian never cared at all. "Since when do you care?" Conner asked.

Damian narrowed his eyes. "Just pray you'd never find out why." he hissed. "Let go of him. He doesn't even know your name. As far as he knows, he never even met Conner Kent"

Conner wanted to wonder why but he didn't get the chance.

"Damian!!"

They both looked at the door to see Cassandra shouting his name. She also gave conner a similar frown and her own version of the batglare. "Damian!!" Cassandra shouted again.

Damian put his sword on his back again and frowned at Conner. He made sure to bump into him on his way to his sister. Damian went inside the house without once glancing back.

Cassandra stared at Conners face for a moment before her frown dropped. She slowly closed the door behind her without ever saying a word.

The wind blew in the trees. The flowers danced in the air and the leaves sang their song. All of which told Conner he should leave. "What happened here?" Conner murmured quietly. The wind blew in the trees. The garden provided a sense of peace but no response.

==========

.

.

_**A few weeks later:** _

_**.** _

.

Reading to preschoolers became a habit Tim never thought he'd develop. It was initially Dicks idea. A way to relax that didn't involve punching people twice his size.

Gotham north's public library was the closest library to WE where he could go there before or after his work was finished. Tim developed a liking for kids there.

They sat on small colorful cubic chairs and gasped at everything Tim said. Their endless trail of questions after a story bothered Tim to no end but their sweet innocence made up for it.

That day Mary showed up after two weeks of silent treatment. For Two weeks she didn't talk to him, out of unexplained guilt. But she showed up in his office with a gift. Mary had finally returned the favor. She made him a Bisexual pride flag pin as a thank you for the Aromantic pin Tim made for her when they were younger. Mysteriously, Mary insisted Tim should wear it today at the library.

Suspicious, but honestly what could go wrong?

Tim arrived at the library and was tackled to death by a bunch of children waiting for him. Tim laughed it off and played his role as usual. Emphasizing on every word and changing his voice with every POV. The Kids giggled and laughed at his face all the time.

"The jungle book" never felt so interesting as it did then.

Tim finished on time. The kids begged him to read another one but the parents arrived, slowly taking the children away with them.

Tim was left alone in the children's room. He looked out of the window, the afternoon sun shining with all its might and brightening their city.

Tim couldn't help but smile at the view.

The sun... Was that supposed to remind him about something?

Tim stood up and wiped his clothes. He bent down to pick up the books the kids had left. So careless. They'd make horrible criminals. They were leaving evidence of their crime everywhere. Tim chuckled lowly and picked up the tower of books to put them back on the shelves.

He could barely see what was in front of him, the tower of books almost blocked his vision but he knew the library by heart. The old librarian couldn't manage it all on her own so Tim helped every once in a while.

He started walking and tried not to topple the tower of books and hoped not to hit someone. From the corner of his eyes he saw the shadow of another human on his way but He recognised the person's existence too late.

Tim bumped into another boy and spilled coffee all over his leather jacket. the books fell out of Tims hands to the ground. Tim kneeled down and hurried to pick them up and thought of something to say to the other boy, whose clothes were completely soaked in coffee. "Sorry... Sorry... Im clumsy.... Madly clumsy." Tim murmured and tried to pick the books one by one.

The other boy kneeled down and, surprisingly, helped him arrange the books back where they were. "It's okay. I should have looked where I was going." he whispered quietly.

"I'm so sorry for your shirt---" but Tims words were lost on the way when they both reached for the same book. The boy's hand landed on his and Tim could feel his face start to warm up.

He looked up to see the boy but he was too close and he could only see the others dark blue eyes. Tim could see his own reflection in them. He smiled fondly.

"Hi." the boy said confidently.

"Greetings." Tim whispered very formally but regretted it a moment later. He jumped back and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "I mean, heh-- hi."

The boy was wearing a black leather jacket, a red shirt and a pair of black jeans. He tilted his head a little. "where did you get that?" the other boy asked, pointing at the bisexual pin on Tim's coat. Tim touched it unconsciously with a nervous smile. "Oh, my friend made it for me." Tim explained with a smile.

"Cool. I need something like that too."

Tims eyes lit up. "Really?" Tim murmured, voice filled with hope. The other boy smiled and winked. Tim felt his heart expanding too much in his chest. Tim cursed himself for acting this childish!

"Oh... I'm Tim, by the way." Tim said with a smile and offered a hand. The other boy accepted the hand shake with a smile.

"The librarian asked me to tell the person here to bring the red roses," The boy murmured and pointed at the flowers on the second shelf. It was the librarians favorite red roses, which none of the children were allowed to touch.

Tim nodded and put aside the books. "Oh yes... The pot... Red roses, Flowers." he murmured and picked it up in one try. The boy came closer and tried to take it away from his hands.

"I'll take it. You have your hands full with those books." He murmured. Tim pulled the flowers back and hugged it like a teddy bear. "NO!" he almost shouted awkwardly, but the other was persistent and took the flowers.

Tim wanted to punch himself in the face for acting like a child. He picked up the books and looked at the new boy, the roses were almost covering his face completely. "Can you see in front of you?" he asked. The boy nodded and brought the vase a little bit lower so that Tim could see his face.

"The librarian sure spends a lot of time on it. These Roses look so lively." He murmured. Tim showed them the way.

They went from the long way, Tim wanted to get to know this mysterious fellow better. "Well... Yeah... Things are usually more beautiful up close." Tim said with a smile.

They met the librarian at the reception. She took her baby away from the boy and called him a "handsome man". Tim could see his mesmerizing blue eyes clearly once again. Tim couldn't look away.

Suddenly, He looked up and they locked eyes. Tim turned his gaze at the wall immediately but it was too late. The boy already knew.

He looked at Tim once again. His blue eyes landed on Tims grey ones and stayed there. Tim expected him to look away after a few minutes but he didn't. Slowly, his face formed a smirk.

The boy stepped closer and stared at Tims eyes with a knowing smirk that made Tim's heart start to beat in his throat. He tried to use batman's technique to make his heartbeat slow down but he couldn't. His entire being was filled with something he couldn't name as he stared at the mischievous blue eyes of the other.

He leaned down towards Tim, their eyes inches apart and Tims breath was caught in his throat. Tim didn't want to take any chances. His thoughts were lost in those blue eyes.

Suddenly the other boy stood up and put a reasonable distance between them, but his smirk didn't fall, neither did the mischief in his eyes. "You're right." he said confidently.

Tim gathered his breath to form words. "About what?" he asked curiously.

"Your eyes... They are more beautiful up close." he said.

The other boy turned on his heels to leave. A gave Tim a salute before going for the door.

Tim swallowed nervously. He took a deep breath. The words left his mouth before he even knew it. "I'd like to make it up to you." Tim murmured. "Would you like to get dinner with me tonight?"

The boy stopped. He turned around with the mischievous smirk back on place. "that's lovely. When and where?"

Tim swallowed nervously. "Helios cuisine... It's not too far away I can text you the address." he said and waved his phone in the air. The boy took out his phone, way too enthusiastic to exchange numbers.

Tim sends him the address, still not believing that it's reality. He was getting himself a date in the children section of the library he volunteered in, "unbelievable" he murmured quietly.

That made The other one smirk too. He was joyful too. Enjoying this exchange as much as Tim did.

It all came to a stop when The other boys' watch started glowing red. He covered it with his other hand and gave Tim an apologetic smile. "Sorry I... I have to go." he murmured quietly.

"It's ok. I'll see you tonight." Tim said with a smile.

The other boy saluted once again and wanted to run out of the library, but Tim had a very important question. "May I know your name, before we head out?" he said very loudly.

The other stopped running. He turned around for the last time. "Conner." the other boy said with a soft smile. "Conner Kent."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a kudos or let me what you think in the comments even if you want to shout at me lol. 💜
> 
> Find me on Tumblr [here!](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/comic-feels) (@comic-feels on tumblr)


	6. Love conquers all.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They go on a date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
> 
> So, here we are.  
> The final chapter....  
> Ah... I'll miss this story. T-T

_**That morning**_ :

Surprisingly Conner had mail.

"Gotham public library. Timothy Drake-Wayne volunteers at this time and date and reads to kids. Be there before the afternoon, pretend you've seen him for the first time and just be yourself, In case you want a second chance with him.

-Agent M.

Ps. I know how to kill you 11 different ways without the use of kryptonite and you know by now that I abide to no rules. Take your next steps carefully, boy of steel.

PPs. My real Name is Mary Smith and this is my address. if you mess this golden opportunity up, come to me."

===========

Wayne Labs. One of the most advanced laboratories in the world which, secretly, made most of Batman's gadgets.

In one of the most confidential rooms, the person Tim wanted to see right now was working. She was volunteering which meant she could spare a few minutes.

Tim opened the giant metallic door and stepped inside. "Hello, Mary." he said enthusiastically. Mary looked up from her microscope and closed her notebook. She put a smile on her own and hopped off the chair. "Wow... Someones a little too happy." Mary said and playfully moved her eyebrows up and down to mock Tim.

Tim cleared his throat. "I'm here for the reports of the latest projects." he said formally. Mary's mouth formed an O, mocking him again. "Oh sure. Do you want some coffee?"

"Yes." he admitted. Mary moved to the coffee maker and took two mugs, pouring sweet coffee into them. Tim sat behind the small table that "eating" was written on.

Tim could see her smiling faintly while making coffee. "So you're here for the reports." she repeated. Tim nodded.

"The same reports that doctor Williams emailed you last night?"

Tims smile fell. He wanted to scream at himself. He'd spent the entire night working on them, how could he overuse an excuse like that?

Tim huffed and massaged the sides of his face. "Yes." he admitted in defeat.

Mary laughed loudly and turned around. Leaning against the counter and staring at Tim. Her smile was unusually happy and nervous at the same time. "Why are you really here?" she murmured curiously.

"I... Uh..." Tim murmured softly and touched the back of his neck. The words just spilled out of his mouth when their eyes met. "I met a boy in the library."

Mary clearly was acting but her mouth formed and O and she nodded. "That's interesting." she said quietly with a mischievous smirk. "And..."

"Anddddd..." Tim trailed off. "He's a flirt. This is tall. Big frame... Mysterious eyes in the color of the sky after a storm."

"Which is?"

"Beautiful."

Mary hummed thoughtfully and bit her lip nervously. "And his name is...."

"Conner Kent." Tim said loudly.

Her face was lifted by a smile. "You should tell me all about it." she insisted, leaning forward. "How did you guys meet? Is he... Uhm... tall?"

Tim raised an eyebrow, bursting into laughter. "Tall?" he mocked.

Mary rolled her eyes. "Yeah... tall? What of it?"

Tims laughter slowly ceased away. "No.. It's much taller than me." he admitted.

"But he is Tall."

"Mary!!"

This was Mary's time to start laughing. She shook her head and slowly stood up. Gently hanging up her lab coat and putting on her coats. She winked at Tim and nodded at the door. "Come on lover boy. You can tell me while we get out." she insisted.

Tim was more than happy to comply. They put their mugs in the sink and closed the door, Locking the lab.

~

Tim opened the door and held it open for Mary to pass. "... And I invited him to Helios cuisine and that's where I'm heading." Tim concluded. Mary smiled widely at him. When they walked out of Wayne Labs, the weather was colder. Mary had to cling the coats closer to herself to stop her body from freezing over. Tim was used to the weather.

Mary looked up with a mischievous smirk. "Well that looks good." Mary said with a smile and pushed her rebellious blonde hair out of her face. "Im... Im sure you guys are going to have fun."

Mary looked at her clock and her smile dropped. "You should go. And I should head back home if I want to come back for tomorrow's shift on time." she murmured, looking up at her childhood friend.

Without warning, Mary slowly looped her arms around Tim and squeezed, pulling Tim into a rare hug. Mary closes her eyes and offered no explanation, resting her head in Tims shoulder.

Tim hesitantly returned the hug, feeling that Mary needs it. "Is everything ok?" he murmured. He felt Mary stiffen and then nodd hesitantly.

"Have fun, Tim." Mary murmured in his ear. "No pressure right?" she slowly let go and saw him face to face. Tim laughed it off. "Of course there's no pressure... I think... I think I might fall for this boy."

Mary's eyes narrowed. "Fall /carefully." she threatened. "I'm not getting your arse off to a Hanahaki specialist again... And I might actually consider stabbing you with an arrow as it's my duty as an aromantic." she threatened playfully.

Tim rolled his eyes. "I'll be fine," he said with a shrug. "Go think about your own life."

Mary took a step back, another and another. "Bye bye lover boy. Don't be mad if he screws it up!" she said and turned around to leave.

Tim shook his head with a smile. Mary, bossy Mary. He looked back to see if she went on the bus. From the distance, Tim could hear Mary screaming in delight, "I can't believe it worked!!"

===========

Conner was running late.

Conner was running late.

And the driver was running even later!

When he reached the address Tim had texted, he was almost half an hour late because he got distracted during patrol. Tim was walking to the restaurant as fast as he was.

Apparently they were both distracted during patrol.

Tim waved for him. Conner swallowed hard and stepped closer with the easiest smile he could. "Hi." he said awkwardly.

"Sorry, I got stuck in traffic." Tim apologetically. Conner nodded. "It's ok, I just got here. Crazy traffic. I was in a hurry too."

Tim laughed. "Well, I can see that." he said with a smile. Tim pointed at where Conners undone tie was.

Conner looked down and his blood ran cold for a moment. "Oh... I'm- I'm so sorry..." he murmured and pulled out his tie entirely. "I don't know how to tie it I--" he wanted to put it away entirely but Tim shook his head.

"Its Ok let me just fix it." Tim said and hesitantly reached his hand out to take Conners undone Tie from his hand, looping it around his neck and starting to work, awkwardly doing it and not realising both of them were slowly turning into red tomatoes.

"So?" Tim said and swallowed and slowly drew his hands back. "Shall we?"

//a faceless boy looked at himself in the mirror with a smile and then looked at Tim. They were in a farmhouse. "Thanks dude!" he said and punched Tim in the shoulder a little too hard. Tim rubbed it gently and nodded. He was a friend or maybe not... Tim was being strangely pulled towards him with invisible strings.//

Conner's voice broke him out of his stupor. "We shall." he said with a smile. Tim shrugged the memory(flashback?) of the faceless boy

~

They walked out of the exit laughing hysterically, holding hands and clinging close to each other.

"And then I shouted, Damian put it back down!" Tim explained, trying to stop himself from tearing up from the memory. "And he didn't respond! Acted like he didn't see me and ran away with my Wayne Enterprises files! Man, that boy will steal my job one day."

Conner laughed hysterically as if he'd known Damian his entire life. Which got the wheels spinning in the detectives mind but he shrugged it off. Tim thought Conner probably laughed easily at everything.

Silence settled between them as time passed. They stopped in front of the Restaurant entrance and stared at each other with soft smiles.

Eventually Conner opened his mouth to say goodbye but Tim beat him to it. For once, listening to the ache in his heart.

He gently grabbed Conners hand and laced their fingers together. "Wait... Come with me." Tim murmured, tugging Conner's hand. "I know a good spot."

Conner's eyes landed on his own. Tim swallowed hard and slowly detangled his fingers from around Conners. Tim bit his lower lip, there was a tug in his heart, a feeling that made him lash out and hold this boy as close to his heart as he possibly could. Tims heart physically hurt when he let go.

"A good spot?" Conner murmured. Tim expected him to turn it down. It was madly late. The moon was shining and the streets around them slowly shutting down at 3 am. Tim knew any self respecting Gothamite would rush home now but Conner wasn't a gothamite was he, he was from Snellville?

Wait-- Tim gasped lowly-- how did he know Conner was from Smallville? Conner only ever mentioned Kansas and metropolis.

However he didn't have enough time to think.

Tim blushed feverishly when Conner gently tangled their fingers together and held hands in front of them, inching closer. "Well, I guess we should see it then." he murmured.

"Heh.. Heh.." Tim laughed nervously. He shook his head and replaced his awkward smile with a genuine one. He held Conners hand tighter. And nodded at the direction of the end of the street.

No words were needed.

Conner followed with a laugh as Tim led the way, running across the streets, never letting go of their hold in their hands.

~

Tim had never actually shared this spot with anyone before. He has never even come here outside of customs but bringing Conner here just felt right.

It was in Gotham outskirts, the last station the metro station took them, up the hill and gave them a magnificent view of Gotham skyline, surrounded by tall trees and breathing fresh air.

Conner was the one who broke the tense silence. "Wow... I didn't know Gotham could hold such beauty." he murmured softly, not taking his eyes off the view.

Tim smiled. He slowly but surely inched his hand closer to Conners. When their fingers touched a sly smirk appeared on Conners Face, like he'd win an unknown battle.

"Where are you from, again?" Tim asked.

Conner laughed. "Smallville in Kansas. But I live in metropolis. I'm here for a small interview." He explained. Taking his eyes off the view for the first time to meet Tims grey eyes.

Something was pulling Tim closer, something in those eyes was tugging his heart and Tim forgot what he was saying. He hummed. "Do you have any... Siblings?" he asked. Tim laughed at the thought of why that question crossed his mind.

Conner nodded. He looked back at the view. "I have a... Younger brother... you can say." he answered.

"Why kind of?"

"Well... I met my father pretty later on in my life. And when I met him, he didn't want me around his family."

Tim hummed. "That's..." but he lost his trail of thoughts.

//the watchtower. Space. Looking at the earth just like Tim remembered when Bart and Cassie were devouring the cafeteria. This time... There was the same faceless figure that appeared in his dreams every night//

Tim stilled, he could feel his heart starting to beat frantically in his chest like he was attacked.

"Tim?"

//"hey Tim, Are there going to be any sudden missions from Batman this weekend?" asked the same faceless boy with the S Shield on his chest.//

"Tim?? You alright? You're making me nervous now--"

//"I'm a little bit nervous." the faceless boy admitted quietly, this time his slightly curly black hair was visible in Tims dreams.

Tim hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. "There is nothing to be nervous about," he assured him. "Ma and Pa are the kindest people in the world, believe me."//

"Tim you're having a seizure" Conner almost shouted. "Your heart is going crazy." Tim felt Conner grab his body in the real world, trying to stop it from falling.

//"I don't know man, your heart is going like crazy." the boy said pointed at where tims heart was supposed to be.//

Tim clutched his heart. His eyes slowly opened and saw a blank face in front of him. The blank face that followed him was pleasant. The same face he knew he had forgotten. The same faceless boy he'd fallen deeply in love with that gave him Hanahaki.

Illusion started to collide with reality. He could hear Conner saying his name like a distant sound. The faceless boy in front of him slowly got a face as the voice grew louder.

Tims eyes grew louder as the faceless boy grew a face, slowly forming eyes, nose and mouth. It slowly became real and memories started to crash at his mind. At the last moment the faceless boy had a face now. Blue eyes, black hair, square jaw. One that he knew very well and was actually in front of him right now.

Conner.

Illusion disappeared and reality settled in. Conners face inches away from his own, panicked and Trying to shake Tim out of his stuper.

The faceless boy in his dreams, the happy feelings, the euphoria was all Conner. Conner. Conner.

Tim felt like his brain had fried. All the gaps in his memory caused by Hanahaki were filled. He was whole again. He knew who Conner really was. He knew who Superboy really was.

"Tim, Tim you're scaring me now!" Conners voice almost broke. "That's it. I'm calling an ambulance."

Tim knocked the phone out of Conners hand as fast as he could. His mind couldn't come up with something to say, Just bewilderment.

Conner's mouth dropped. "Tim?" he asked softly.

Tim couldn't stop his hands he slapped conner across the face as hard as he could, hoping to hurt the stupid half-kryptonian.

Conner moved his face to prevent Tim from breaking his fingers. Conner was stunned for a moment before he turned back with a frown. "What was that for?" he asked loudly.

Tims hand gently landed on Conners cheek, just to check that it was real, warm and soft under his hand. "You're--" Tim murmured, mouth slightly parted and eyes blown wide.

Conner blinked once. "Im... what?" he whispered softly, putting his own hand above Tim's.

Tim grabbed the other side of his face and pressed their mouths together.

Conner froze under his touch but Tim closed his eyes and almost melted in the kiss. Tims mind was racing a thousand thoughts a second because he was doing something he never thought he would do with Conner, with his best friend.

Conner smiled into the kiss, grabbed Tims sides and pulled him impossibly closer, never breaking their rhythm, soft lips and teeth. Both of them eagerly pouring into the hungry kiss they've been waiting for.

But eventually they had to part away to breathe. Neither of them were willing to let go, they cling to each other, forehead resting against the other, breathing the same air.

A small laugh escaped Conner's lips. Tim looked up at those mesmerizing blue eyes that managed to steal his soul not once, but twice.

"You didn't finish... Im what?" Conner murmured, voice deep and uncertain. Tim liked the way Conners hand was toying with his hair, he liked the way Conners entire being radiated warmth and happiness. He loved the sense of rise and fall of Conners chest when he slowly lowered his hand to land it over Conners /beating heart.

How could he have ever forgotten his love?

"Alive." Tim said breathlessly. He pressed his mouth to Conners again, his touch feather light. He didn't stop the tears escaping from his eyes or the sob that left his throat.

//"You dull-headed Kryptonian."

Their forehead pressed together. Conner couldn't stop the smile on his lips. "Rob?" he murmured softly, looking at Tims stormy grey eyes. Tim closed his eyes and nodded.

"I missed you, so, so much." Conner breathed out and grabbed the back of Tims neck just to pull him impossibly closer into another heated kiss.

Tim let Conner take the kiss to whatever direction he wanted, they were both too out of it to object.

On the branches of the nearby trees. Black Bat signalled Robin to put away their stash of Kryptonite. Everything was safe.

Black Bat grabbed Robin and pulled him back to the manor. Robin was insisting he should stay and make sure their brother was handled properly by that halfbreed. However, Cass knew their older brother would appreciate some privacy at this point.

~  
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~~~~~ _ **THE END**_ ~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a kudos or a comment! I love to hear your replies, a simple emoji in the comments makes me so happy you can never even imagine!!💜💜💜
> 
> Thanks for reading this fic, everyone! I hope you enjoyed it and had fun. It was extremely hard for me to write romance... I don't know why.
> 
> MERRY CHRISTMAS!
> 
> best wishes,  
> -Sabrina.


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